Working the bar in a bikers pub in weymouth I used to hear many farfetched tales, but one guy really stood out.
The silver fox. He was so full of shit it was unreal, but I always found it good fun to question him on his past during my shifts to help the time go by. He stands at 5 foot nothing with long flowing silver hair, late 40's perhaps, weedy frame, bad tattoos on skinny arms, bright blue eyes and a constant expression of 'I know it sounds ridiculous but it's all true and I'm awesome'

1. His bike was stolen by the hells angels. So he bust into one of their hangouts unarmed, took out two guys by the entrance, managing to steal a shoutgun from one of them, strutted through a room of bikers who now respected him because of the balls it took to pull off such daring stunt, retreived his bike and left.

2. He was caught by the police doing a wheelie around the king george III statue in weymouth. When repremanded was told his charge was lack of control of his vehicle. He claims he told the police he was in full control and could prove it to them, so the police took him to the station and laid out a course of cones for him to wheelie around, which he did successfully and was let off any charge.

3. He slid his bike under a lorry, like whoever it was did in whatever that film was.

4. He got from bournemouth to weymouth on his bike in 8 minutes.

There are many, many more, including a long stint in the military where he also committed to several brave, and daring tasks.

Proper tosser, but I almost felt sorry for him, he could barely handle 2 pints of john smiths let alone any of his other bullshit!
( Glovington, Fri 6 Jun 2014, 13:04, 16 replies)

Reminds me of this.
( .Yeti., Fri 6 Jun 2014, 13:17, closed)

Also, to make it more awkward
one of the older barmaids there was going out with him, and eventually engaged. After her shift she would join him on that side of the bar and was literally cast under his spell of bullshit, she used to look at him dreamily like she genuinely beleived she was going out with the coolest guy in the world.
( Glovington, Fri 6 Jun 2014, 13:25, closed)

God damned happy people
Why don't they all piss off with their blissful ignorance.
( pineapplecharm D d M Y, H:i, Fri 6 Jun 2014, 17:32, closed)

I know, right?

( Glovington, Mon 9 Jun 2014, 15:08, closed)

Mind you, there was genuinely a guy who mooned a bunch of Hell's Angels in their own clubhouse, threw a live puppy at them, then escaped on a bulldozer (down a motorway, at walking pace, causing a 5km tailback). Here.

I bet no-one believed him either.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 6 Jun 2014, 13:34, closed)

Maybe that was the silver fox too
before he travelled back in time and became old
( Glovington, Fri 6 Jun 2014, 13:45, closed)

That story should have won a pulitzer.
Best article ever.
(eViLegion Chief Commissioner of the Scottish Lunacy Board, Fri 6 Jun 2014, 13:59, closed)

Did an actual lol at #2

( Major Turd for tonight only, Sat 7 Jun 2014, 10:43, closed)