How clean is your house?"Part of my kitchen floor are thick with dust, grease, part of a broken mug, a few mummified oven-chips, a desiccated used teabag and a couple of pieces of cutlery", says Sandettie Light Vessel Automatic. To most people, that's filth. To some of us, that's dinner. Tell us about squalid homes or obsessive cleaners.
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 25 Mar 2010, 13:00)
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nothing of interest......my house is fairly average, it gets grotty, I get a cleaning frenzy and the grot builds back up until my tolerance level is breached.
In fact, I'd love to get a cleaner as I hate cleaning, but am always worried they'll nick my stuff or wank in my knicker drawer.
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fluffymitten NAN, Sat 27 Mar 2010, 17:21,
8 replies)
Surelyyou could get a lady cleaner? Statistically much less likely to wank in your knicker drawer.
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.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Sat 27 Mar 2010, 17:49,
closed)
Statistically much less likelybut it's worth putting up a clandestine webcam just in case.
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sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Sat 27 Mar 2010, 18:03,
closed)
HeheheIndeed
(, Sat 27 Mar 2010, 18:26, closed)
As a professional cleaner, I can completely remove your worries and doubts on this subjectI will absolutely indulge in acts of theft and onanism whilst in your house. No need to worry about whether I will or not.
I will.
My starting rate is £3 an hour, plus all the knickers I can eat.
(, Sat 27 Mar 2010, 18:18, closed)
Sounds like a good dealAre you based in the midlands?
(, Sun 28 Mar 2010, 23:09, closed)
Yes.If by 'Midlands', you mean 'Central Belt'.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 13:52, closed)
I'm thinking of getting a cleanerBut I feel my house is too grotty and I'd feel bad asking them to come and clean.
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thistle, Sat 27 Mar 2010, 19:38,
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just clean it before they come round, thus rendering them a pointless waste of money...
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fluffymitten NAN, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 22:09,
closed)
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