The phlem jar
Onboard some royal navy ships and subs it was customary to spit into a jar and put £1 in another jar for the privilege. The person who drank/ate the contents of the phlem jar got the money.

Smudge Smith won the money whilst instantaneously making half the mess throw up. The throw up wasn't kept in a jar unfortunately.
( slartifartfast When all around are losing their heads, duck., Thu 2 Feb 2012, 14:02, 8 replies)

Potentially coincimental.
Is this the Smudger who lived in Lancaster/Galgate and then went across the pond? HMS Cornwall?

Edit: Also, *boke*
( Pig Bodine., Thu 2 Feb 2012, 14:20, closed)

I would think that their were lots of smudgers in the RN
however this is the smudge who shit himself while trying to force out a fart while replenishing the ship in devonport and had to ask for a change of overalls to be brought up. It was a toss up between the phlem jar and the "can someone bring me up a set of ovies as I might have followed through" story. He also was known to enjoy a 'golden shower' and was in all actuality the dirtiest fucker I've ever met.

Oh he also had to throw a load of porn overboard when he heard customs may be coming onboard due to the nature of the porn and that is all that needs to be said.
( slartifartfast When all around are losing their heads, duck., Thu 2 Feb 2012, 15:20, closed)

Phlegm
is how we spelling nazis like to see it written.
( MisterPunch did it that way on, Thu 2 Feb 2012, 17:40, closed)

I normally write it as 'it'

( slartifartfast When all around are losing their heads, duck., Thu 2 Feb 2012, 20:40, closed)

Afterwards we said - "We told you, just after you started that you'd won and could stop."
and he said, "I tried!"
(karnuvap, Thu 2 Feb 2012, 19:11, closed)

It's difficult to speak
with vomit coming out your ears
( slartifartfast When all around are losing their heads, duck., Thu 2 Feb 2012, 20:38, closed)

...
but I couldn't bite it off.
(Rsoles, Thu 2 Feb 2012, 21:16, closed)

Gak!

(SausageWarrior destination Zululand, come on boys jump in the van, Sat 4 Feb 2012, 12:11, closed)