Some people have no sense of self-preservation whatsoever
I'm getting the tube into work this morning, it's 8:35 or thereabouts, and I'm joined in my carriage by a couple. A couple who think nothing of kissing each other in a crowded tube carriage as many times as they want. So inbetween Archway and Camden Town, the kiss each other about 200 times. It's like punctuation: one will say something, then they'll kiss. Then the other will say something, then they'll kiss. Then they'll kiss just to make sure, each one a big, noisy smacker.

Do these people not realise that a mere half-metre away, there is a man who is ready to take the pen from his Sudoku and ram it through their stupid fucking kissing faces? I mean, even if they had just got married that instant, there wouldn't be just cause for that sort of public display of affection. Even if she'd just let him sleep with her sister, I'd still think he was overdoing it.
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:54, 12 replies)

Dunno
what's her sister like?
(username failed moderation, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:56, closed)

I have no idea
I was too busy picturing them both beaten to a bloody pulp
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:57, closed)

Crippling sexual frustration.
Have a wank, or something. Maybe not on the tube, though.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:57, closed)

See I sometimes get the tube in with my girlfriend
We talk, if it's particularly crowded we'll share a space, and I'll kiss her goodbye when she gets off at her stop. If it was, say, 11:30 on a Friday night, we might display a little more public affection, but there's no need to advertise to the rest of the carriage that we're having sex, is there?
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 15:00, closed)

You're forgetting
They invented it
(BearWithLittleBrain, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 15:02, closed)

What. the underground?
Impressive that they found time among all that kissing.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 15:06, closed)

I have to confess, that I agree with you.
I can't stand audible kissing on TV, either. Ugh.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 15:10, closed)

Or whispering
Whispering on TV drives me up the fucking wall
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 15:20, closed)

To be fair,
most of what's on TV is infuriating shite.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 15:26, closed)

No sex please, we're British.

( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Mon 5 Mar 2012, 16:27, closed)

The Spanish have a word for it
I was on the Barcelona Metro a couple of years ago. Two very beautiful young men were sucking face with great enthusiasm in my carriage. Nobody else batted an eyelid.
(ubergeekian, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 17:29, closed)

other than you
you leching twanker
(elixir of truth, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 19:43, closed)