Try reading it properly and then using your brain to process the information provided.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 1 Jul 2013, 11:49, 1 reply)

You still only have half a sandwich,
with 2 eggs crammed in. It'll probably slide apart.
If you're going to the trouble of frying the bread, you might as well just cook yourself a plate of food, and break out the eating irons.

POIDH.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 1 Jul 2013, 11:57, closed)

Are you really this thick?
How do you manage to get out of bed in the morning without accidentally killing yourself?
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 1 Jul 2013, 12:00, closed)

Now now, ladies.
I'm sure we can resolve this with a friendly jelly wrestle.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 1 Jul 2013, 12:06, closed)

I ain't going to wrestle him The LOVELY Doc Ess.
I don't want to get bent spastic on me.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 1 Jul 2013, 12:24, closed)

I'm sorry.
I've reread it, and it just looks destined to collapse. Also, you'll get greasy fingers, which defeats the object of making a sandwich.

Edit: I see your edit. Perhaps the confusion was that the recipe for the perfect sandwich (singular) makes two sandwiches. I still don't like it, though.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 1 Jul 2013, 12:12, closed)

You are obviously some sort of denty-brained retard.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 1 Jul 2013, 12:15, closed)

If you like.
But you make crap sandwiches, so nyer.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 1 Jul 2013, 12:17, closed)

That, right there, is the statement of a denty-brained retard.
A denty-brained retard AND a foodwrong.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 1 Jul 2013, 12:20, closed)

Can I just mention how enormously aroused I am right now?

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 1 Jul 2013, 12:30, closed)

Of COURSE you can The LOVELY Vaggy.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 1 Jul 2013, 12:33, closed)

I'm enormously aroused right now.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 1 Jul 2013, 12:36, closed)

PHWOAR!
:D
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Mon 1 Jul 2013, 12:38, closed)