Supermarket shennanigans
Whilst queuing at the supermarket tills, I wanted to privately relay a message to my friend. Not wishing to be overheard I typed the message out on my phone and handed it to her.

She then proceeded to read aloud, with the concentration and diction of a 5-year old struggling with new words: "THE. PEOPLE. BEHIND. US. STINK. OF. BOOZE. I. THINK. THEY. MIGHT. BE. GYPSIES."
(R. Jimlad twitter.com/sirmarkymark, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 18:07, 59 replies)

You abducted a 5 year old?

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 18:51, closed)

Does your crippling autism prevent you from whispering, you fat-jawed, grunting untermensch?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 18:54, closed)

No, but good manners might.
Whispering can be overheard, lips can be read, etc. He tried to use a somewhat more civilized approach. Unfortunately his friend was a bit too thick to pick up on it.

I realize that trying to explain good social behaviour to you is like trying to explain the colour blue to a blind man, but there you are.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Sat 18 Aug 2012, 19:37, closed)

Jesus wept.
Every time I think I've grasped how dim and dull you are you just jump out with something even wetter and dimmer.

www.b3ta.com/questions/footinmouthtwo/post1707897/
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 19:40, closed)

*shrug*
I rest my case. You're a never ending font of rodomontade and meaningless posturing, like a thirteen year old trying to impress the world with how cool he is by sneering at everything in an attempt to hide his own inadequacies- which, in fact, only highlights them.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Sat 18 Aug 2012, 19:48, closed)

I'm sneering at you because you're mediocre and I'm not. I'm better than you. By any measure.
Sorry if being much shitter than me bothers you. It's almost certainly much too late to do anything about it.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 19:52, closed)

Ummm... yeah.
That must be it.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Sat 18 Aug 2012, 21:00, closed)

Wassamatter Dr?
I thought you were better than the Amorous Badger, but it looks like you got out of life on the wrong side this morning.

I'm trying to imagine a universe in which you are better than The Resident Loon at ANYTHING...




...no, can't do it.

Still, this may have provided me with some subject matter for another of my dubious 'exploits'.
(K.W.A. Knickers With Attitude, Mon 20 Aug 2012, 9:54, closed)

Ever better manners would be to not mention it in the first place
the friend could probably smell it themselves without having it pointed out to them.
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 21:22, closed)

Cheers Res.
(R. Jimlad twitter.com/sirmarkymark, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 23:23, closed)

dickhead

(MayorBoris, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 19:55, closed)

Excellent contribution to the internet.
Your carers must be terribly proud.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 20:07, closed)

Dr
You are a fucking lame cunt to be posting your pent up sexual aggression and ramblings on a Saturday night. I know your wife is a pig, but go out for a pint or something instead of posting your boring bile as a distraction to your shitty life and crappy IT job.

R.Jimlad I salute you!

To the rest of the generic response brigade: SUCK MY BALLS, as that is the best offer you will get this weekend.

/off to pub
( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 20:56, closed)

I like how you took the time to come into this thread, read the replies and made the effort to post, even though you didn't have to and could easily have ignored the whole thing and gone outside.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 21:14, closed)

I like the fact you never leave your computer you fat mess.
Try really hard to get a life my gay friend, there are clubs in Brighton you can go to.
( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 12:12, closed)

Disgraceful homophobia here.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 14:55, closed)

ur well gay lol

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 15:35, closed)

Good white knighting there AB.

Now go back to surfing your bbw sites.

Yeeeha!
( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 15:51, closed)

I like how you talk abject bollocks all the time Brayn.
And further up the QOTW page yet another of your oh so sad attempts at being witty www.b3ta.com/questions/footinmouthtwo/post1708048 I can just imagine you sitting there in your specially reinforced seat, tears of laughter rolling down your flabby cheeks and your leg sore from slapping it so much.
( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 15:50, closed)

Double response for double butthurtery.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 16:31, closed)

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 20 Aug 2012, 9:30, closed)

Oh, now TMT,
I think you're being a bit hard on the desperately unfunny, repetitive, supercilious cock.

We should try to understand him, perhaps this is a cry for help.

Or go to the pub.
( Infidel , shit and wrong, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 21:29, closed)

what this thread really needs now is:-
Amorous badger saying something about sheds.
(Figmaus, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 23:39, closed)

But at least nobody got upset, right?

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 6:45, closed)

I dunno.
I didn't.

I went out and had some beer.
( Infidel , shit and wrong, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 7:48, closed)

Cheers TMT

(R. Jimlad twitter.com/sirmarkymark, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 23:23, closed)

Fucking hell, mate.
How pissweak are you that you need that shitcunt to be your internet white knight?
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 9:22, closed)

Pig fucker is getting angry!

( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 12:11, closed)

UPPER CASE MAKE BUTTHURTY FEEL ALL BETTERER
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 12:15, closed)

Also considering you run to your mate cr3 and whinge when things are getting too much on here.
You can hardly talk about white knighting.

Laters!
( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 12:15, closed)

What are you prattling on about now?
/ac
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 12:47, closed)

Try reading it slowly you fucking ingrate.

( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 15:50, closed)

I know cr3.
I don't think I've ever discussed you fails with him. Why would I? You're hardly a stimulating topic of conversation.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 16:31, closed)

Not me ballbag but there are a few B3ta members who you have run crying about.
/Oink
( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 20:19, closed)

When I said "you fails" I meant anybody on here.
In fact, I don't think I've ever had a conversation with cr3 about any aspect of b3ta. What paranoid fantasy is it you're indulging in here, petal?
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 20:37, closed)

Reported for blatant trolling and right-wing language.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 1:04, closed)

Awwwww.
Poor ickul lamb.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 9:12, closed)

Ha ha."contribution" to the internet. Is that what you're doing, contributing? To the advancement of mankind? look at you, you're so clever. Loser.
(MayorBoris, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 9:47, closed)

10% of your posts on qftw have been whimpering responses to me.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 10:35, closed)

Oinky oink oink.

( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 12:13, closed)

You're a sad cunt Shambo. Seriously.
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 23:36, closed)

Really?
I was at a wedding reception and a birthday last night while you lot were being upset on the internet. Not convinced you've done much to disprove what I said, to be honest.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 9:10, closed)

How sweet that you went to your little friend's birthday party. Must've be been pretty dull though as you spent most of your time there "contributing" on here. And I'm glad to hear your mother finally got married, seeing as she failed to have you aborted all those (11?) years ago.
(MayorBoris, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 9:56, closed)

You're not really equipped for this.
But you keep bashing away if it makes you less miserable.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 9:58, closed)

Haha.2 minutes for a reply. you just sitting there in your wheelchair pressing f5? Right, time to get up.
(MayorBoris, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 10:15, closed)

You're not very good at disguising yourself, are you selcouth?
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 20:30, closed)

Racist

( wakeupandsmellthebacon, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 20:25, closed)

Drunk isn't a race!

( Infidel , shit and wrong, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 21:30, closed)

Getting drunk is.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 9:44, closed)

TERRIBLE BULLYING OF SCOTTISH PEOPLE!

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Sun 19 Aug 2012, 21:15, closed)

I thought gypsies these days
meant pikeys, people who travel around all the time like in "Snatch" rather than Romanians?

(Gotta say, though, when I was in Brno there was a table of dark skinned people across the restaurant which the native who was taking us to dinner identified as gypsies, and they seemed nice enough. Certainly the younger of the women was hot.)
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Sat 18 Aug 2012, 22:36, closed)

Do you mean the Romany.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 1:15, closed)

Possibly.
Being on the other side of the pond I'm not terribly familiar with the issue firsthand, so I have to rely on other sources.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Sun 19 Aug 2012, 3:50, closed)

Yeah, just remember: Guy Ritchie films are NOT documentaries.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Sun 19 Aug 2012, 21:14, closed)

Pikeys are usually Micks. Because just like all the other spudwogs they think that Ireland's so fucking marvelous that they can't wait to fuck off somewhere else.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Sun 19 Aug 2012, 21:13, closed)

I see...
...what some of you have done here.

It was very funny and you should totally do lots more of it.
(R. Jimlad twitter.com/sirmarkymark, Sat 18 Aug 2012, 23:22, closed)

Man up and tell the dirty gypsies what you think of them to their faces.

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 0:44, closed)

I hate a bigot without the courage of his convictions.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 19 Aug 2012, 9:44, closed)