Clubs! Flowers! Extortion! Profits!
I have had an interesting life thus far; currently I work in an extremely high paying sales job, but I guess that that doesn't count as a good story.

Over the past few years, sometimes I've been minted, and other times I've been destitute and homeless. I've always been able to crash at people's houses and have indulged in such things as drug dealing and chequebook fraud to keep the wolf from the door.

Just occasionally, however, I have been hit by ideas of genius that have made me temporarily wealthy (but usually have unseen ramifications that cause me significant problems later on). These include selling cornflour as cocaine and selling all sorts of things plucked from the roadside.

The scam of which I'm proudest of, however, was one in which I became manager of my own club night. Naturally, there were drinks offers and an entrance fee was charged but there were huge opportunities to earn cash for nothing all night.

My particular favourite was to buy a load of cheap, naff, plastic flowers for 10p each. I then employed (on a profit share basis, favorable to me) three runners to sell these flowers at a quid a pop. I also employed a couple of girls on the same basis to look pretty, flirt and ask for flowers. I only bought a hundred a week, and with the wages for my staff involved, I still made 35p per flower.

"That's only a £35 profit you mug!" I hear you say...

Wrong... the boys and girls I employed resold the flowers again and again and on average I turned over an additional £200 odd quid a night. I never threw flowers away either, unless they were damaged, so week on week the number we could sell grew!

Good to be back by the way!
( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Sat 2 Aug 2008, 20:25, 5 replies)

That is a superb scam.
I knew those flower sellers were dodgy as.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 2 Aug 2008, 20:29, closed)

Of course flower sellers are dodgy.
My sister used to be one.
( girlinthehole, Sat 2 Aug 2008, 20:48, closed)

And it's good to see you back, DP

(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Sun 3 Aug 2008, 11:46, closed)

Good to be back
P!

I've been off the Best Of... board for far too long
( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Sun 3 Aug 2008, 20:46, closed)

lovely to see you again
mr prone.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 5 Aug 2008, 10:18, closed)