Odd Jack
I occasionally work with a charity and one of the regular volunteers is quite a fixture there. Bit odd, dropped on his head or whatnot, sweet old thing, but a bit greedy when it comes to snacks. We’re all told not to leave sweets laying about unless we intend to share.

One day I was asked to clean the kitchen, and throw out all the food, including the meat pies from the last week’s staff meeting. Tsk, a half-dozen pies from one of the best shops in town. I duly binned the whole lot, brightly-colored take away box and all.

Finished cleaning, said hello to Odd Jack, coming to make some tea. I went to put up the cleaning supplies, fussed about straightening things, then walked back to the kitchen several minutes later. And there was Odd Jack, just leaving, both cheeks puffed out and a –well, odd—expression on his face.

I got halfway across the kitchen and stopped. No. Spun around on one foot. Walked to the bin. Peered in. Gingerly tipped open the takeaway box, wailing in my head, No no no! Odd Jack, you did NOT just eat six old meat pies from the dust bin!

Indeed. He must have stuffed two in his jowls and pocketed the remainder. Cheeky bastard.
( kila is reading clocks upside-down as usual, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 12:42, 7 replies)

what sort of staff meeting has meat pies?

( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 13:13, closed)

The Fleet Street Barbershop annual meeting.

(Bushcricket, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 13:39, closed)

Ha!

(sarcastic fringehead feet of clay, buns of steel, head of lettuce, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 14:30, closed)

A staff meeting in Scotland
Not a joke. I worked in an office where this happened regularly. Also rowies, braidies, stovies, and sausage rolls. For those who haven't heard of half these things, they are all variations on the theme of minced meat, pastry, potato and grease. You can turn paper transparent by waving a rowie in front of it.
(leviticus no longer likes the cut of your gib on, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 13:47, closed)

Meat pies and sausage rolls are cheaper than overtime
Especially when they are donated. Apparently their boss had them work through lunch on a fundraiser.
( kila is reading clocks upside-down as usual, Sat 16 Apr 2011, 21:33, closed)

Sounds like:
Prader-Willi syndrome
( Sextant goes to him is emotionally erect, on this day, Sat 16 Apr 2011, 16:20, closed)

Did he say Play-doh Willies?

(with apologies to Stan)
(The Incredible Sulk Finally remembered his password on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 1:52, closed)