Devil's Cock
Is what i call bananas.

Their smell, texture, shape (yes, like a dick) is pure evil. When people eat them near me i have to get away from them. Then Tanya at work puts the skins in the bin near me and they foul up the joint.

The sound of someone biting into a banana is vile. Especially if you happen to be in an environment that is quiet. If you're within close proximity to the 'devil's cock' eater, the sloppy symphony that is created, complete with gagging and heavy breathing, is more porno than fruit eating. Not a bad thing I hear you say, but add the wafting nana smell and it's time for Heatmiser to leave.

Also, funnily enough, the fat guy on tv is now making butterscotch and banana dumplings. He had the nerve to say "This is the first time I've cooked these so we'll see how we go". Don't worry Huey, I have a fair idea how you'll go. Oh my god he's mashing it with a fork.

Also, offal is gross.
Australia is one of the finest meat producers on the planet. Why would I eat the bad bits? Send the hotdogs to you guys I say.
(heatmiser, Wed 14 Jul 2004, 9:03, Reply)