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This is a question Heckles

Forget the drunk bloke at the back yelling incoherent nonsense. Sometimes a well placed heckle can raise a mediocre act to a brilliant night out.
Tell us your best heckles and, if you are brave, the retorts that put you back in your place like the maggot you are.

(, Thu 6 Apr 2006, 13:13)
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This was actually my heckle
Went to see Rik Mayall in the Sunderland Empire in the mid-80s, and his routine contained a certain amount of the same material he had included a few weeks before on his BBC 'Wogan' appearance (which I'd taped and watched over and over again). I was young. And very excited. So when he said 'Can you see alright up there?' (balcony crowd: 'Yes!') my sister and I joined in his retort (in low voices to ourselves) 'Well what're you doing wearing glasses then?' and so on. Ho! ho! weren't we funny?
A few gags later I knew exactly what would make me look really clever and cool. So when he japed 'Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?' I yelled at the top of my voice 'Because it was dead!'
Rik didn't appreciate it. He screamed "FUCK YOU!!!!!!!" and proceeded to run about the stage for the next 5 minutes exhibiting as many different ways of giving V signs to me as possible.
He got a much bigger laugh with my help, and about six months later a friend of my sister's claimed to see the same thing happen at Newcastle City Hall, so he probably planted someone in the crowd to do it.
And he's a millionnaire, so he owes me.
(, Wed 12 Apr 2006, 14:27, Reply)

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