Apart from banning the A-team
as mentioned earlier, my parents were very, VERY open with us from quite a young age and, trust me, it can be just as bad...

One of my chores for earning my 75p a week pocket money was to empty the bins around the house. Due to my parents beliefs about being open about sex, it was apparently not seen as important for them to discreetly dispose of their used condoms, instead choosing to discard them openly into the bedroom waste basket.

Unfortunately, all the liberal, hippy bullshit in the world doesn't stop a small 10 year old brainmeat from freaking the fuck out at the sight of a sopping man-sheath. The bin was dropped to the floor and, upon impact, scattered it's contents across the carpet... including said semen-filled, silicon serpent.

I stared at it for a long, long time trying to decide whether to pick it up and put it back in the bin or just leave it for my parents to find. I had just about decided that it would be marginally less mortifying to wrap it up and move it than it would be to have my parents explain how 'natural' the whole thing was, when I heard someone coming up the stairs, panicked and threw it into the bin.

With. My. Bare. Hands.

You know the game you play with your friends when you're teens where because you've touched a girls hand and she's touched her boob, you've technically touched her boob?
Well, shockingly, I never mentioned to my friends that, by that rationale, I've technically fingered my mum.

*shudders*
(brainmeat ... and that's why it burns when you pee., Thu 10 Sep 2009, 16:00, 11 replies)

And even worse...
...you've had your hands on your dad's cock.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Thu 10 Sep 2009, 16:04, closed)

Gaaah
fuck, I hadn't even considered that! Not that it would have been the first time...
(brainmeat ... and that's why it burns when you pee., Thu 10 Sep 2009, 16:05, closed)

.....
!?
(Lythium deals in lead, my friend., Thu 10 Sep 2009, 16:41, closed)

And mine.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 10 Sep 2009, 17:30, closed)

That's not all
Did you ever kiss your Mum?
(ubergeekian, Fri 11 Sep 2009, 17:07, closed)

*boke*
Truly disgusting! Have a click for the repressed trauma.
(RVD420 has his world coming down on, Thu 10 Sep 2009, 16:19, closed)

You weren't getting a click
until the last bit!
(Dr Zoidberg is going for a scuttle, Thu 10 Sep 2009, 16:49, closed)

c'mon now
we've all fingered your mum
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Thu 10 Sep 2009, 23:38, closed)

True enough
MILF that she is... it's a little different when it's your own mother though and also, in the words of stewie, 'I wrecked the joint on the way out' and have little desire to go back there...
(brainmeat ... and that's why it burns when you pee., Fri 11 Sep 2009, 10:06, closed)

Join the club
We've all fingered your mum.
( gareth_alien will be human again at, Fri 11 Sep 2009, 10:22, closed)

A click...
for 'semen-filled, silicon serpent'.

Dr. Pepper is delicious but stings like fuck coming out the nose. Bastard.
(HomeWithTheDownies A towering inferno of penisy pleasure, Mon 14 Sep 2009, 13:49, closed)