I'm Sorry I've Written A Joke
Challenge: write a joke. As simple joke with a setup and a punchline.
RULES OF ENGAGEMENT - IGNORING THIS COULD RESULT IN BAN
* Don't steal jokes - write them
* Don't flood post
* Just don't be a dick ok?
So join in and write a bad joke and apologise for it.
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(
rob, Wed 8 Aug 2018, 9:00)
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Tell Us Your Story »
Shouting at wine waiters is the pinot call of bad manners.
(
Max Harvey, Fri 6 Oct 2023, 14:16,
Reply)
Why is there only one animal in my stable?
Just big horse.
(
Max Harvey, Fri 6 Oct 2023, 14:15,
Reply)
What do you call bees that are too fat?
Obeesities
(
Groovejackson, Thu 5 Oct 2023, 9:37,
Reply)
What's small, white and fucks the homeless?
Fetanyl.
(
FrenchBoast, Wed 4 Oct 2023, 10:31,
3 replies,
latest was 2 years ago)
My friend is a miner
He wasn't enthusiastic at first, but then he start dig deep into it.
(
FrenchBoast, Wed 4 Oct 2023, 10:30,
8 replies,
latest was 2 years ago)
How much is a McDonalds Sports Day?
About a quarter pounder.
(
FrenchBoast, Wed 4 Oct 2023, 10:18,
Reply)
What's the hardest thing about a easy jet?
EasyJet.
(
FrenchBoast, Wed 4 Oct 2023, 10:14,
Reply)
Similarities
I discovered an interesting thing the other day.
Did you know that on the Canary Islands, in the Eastern Atlantic, just off the coast of Western Sahara, that there are in fact, no canaries? Yep, none, nada, nix, zero canaries.
Itβs the same thing on the Virgin Islands (where Richard Branson lives). Across the entire Virgin Islands you will not find one canary.
(
I_Identify, Fri 29 Sep 2023, 1:08,
5 replies,
latest was 2 years ago)
Why was the road crossed by the chicken?
To use passive voice
(
cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Fri 29 Sep 2023, 0:59,
Reply)
what do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep?
I don't know! Fucking hell leave me alone you weirdo!
(
sticklebrlcks link in bio β€οΈπβ€οΈ, Mon 25 Sep 2023, 10:17,
Reply)
“Why did the chicken cross the road?”
Why do you need to know a chickenβs intentions?
Get a Life!
(
atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Mon 25 Sep 2023, 0:06,
2 replies,
latest was 2 years ago)
Who do wellness gurus call in to salvage their reputations when it turns out they're rapey creeps?
Brand Management
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The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Mon 18 Sep 2023, 9:23,
2 replies,
latest was 2 years ago)
Macbeth finds himself in a car park at dusk, somehow.
"Is this a dogger which I see before me?"
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Covid69 Boris variant., Fri 15 Sep 2023, 18:01,
2 replies,
latest was 2 years ago)
I was too drunk the other night, and a chum says ‘You better hit the sack!’…
So I punched him in the balls.
(
atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Fri 15 Sep 2023, 2:46,
1 reply,
2 years ago)
Anal sex?
Fuck that shit!
(
( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (β―Νβ γ
β―Ν β), Wed 13 Sep 2023, 20:50,
1 reply,
2 years ago)
Please suggest a novel joke suitable for users of B3ta.com that is so funny that rob will include it in his newsletter
ChatGPT
Certainly, here's a novel joke that B3ta.com users might enjoy:
"Why did the computer apply for a job at the bakery?
Because it had a lot of byte-sized experience and could handle all the dough!"
This joke plays on the double meaning of "byte," referencing both computer data and small portions of food, making it a clever and light-hearted tech-related joke that could appeal to the B3ta.com community's sense of humor. Whether Rob includes it in his newsletter will depend on his preferences and the overall tone of the newsletter content.
(
Agent Pr1ck llΗΙ―s ΗΙ₯Κ sΚI ΛΗΙΙld sα΄Ι₯Κ ΗΚΙΙ₯ l, Mon 11 Sep 2023, 22:02,
6 replies,
latest was 2 years ago)
What did Obi-Wan Kenobi say to Luke Skywalker after eating a tin of beans for lunch?
Use the Farts!
(
Woodkovsky βΉοΈβπ»βπ½βπ£βπ©βπ§»βπ, Tue 5 Sep 2023, 13:11,
1 reply,
2 years ago)
I just saw luke skywalker, darth vader, and yoda cycle past in a peleton
it was a tour de force
(
cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Mon 4 Sep 2023, 23:30,
Reply)
Which newsreader wants to Make America Great Again?
MAGA Munchetty
(
The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Mon 4 Sep 2023, 8:20,
Reply)
My own "YMBAR"
You might be a redneck if: You know which brands of beer your dogs prefer.
My original effort didn't have the plurals.
(
danalan Pretty good, for an amateur., Sat 2 Sep 2023, 21:11,
1 reply,
2 years ago)
A mosquito bit me on the penis while I was having sex.
What a fucking cock sucker!
(
atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 16:12,
2 replies,
latest was 2 years ago)
I was sceptical when they told me I'd won the Crab Fighting Contest.
I took it with a pinch assault.
(
Max Harvey, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 10:04,
Reply)
My interview to be a dictator went so well, they hired me on despot.
(
Max Harvey, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 10:03,
Reply)
My nunchuck skills are whirled beating.
(
Max Harvey, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 10:03,
Reply)
Who starred in The Good, The Bad, and The Fanny Fart
Lee van Queef
(
cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 8:51,
Reply)
Which American rapper, songwriter, and record producer melts in your mouth not in your hands?
Eminem
(
Woodkovsky βΉοΈβπ»βπ½βπ£βπ©βπ§»βπ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 16:19,
5 replies,
latest was 2 years ago)
why did the banana go to the doctor?
it wasn't peeling well
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sticklebrlcks link in bio β€οΈπβ€οΈ, Sun 20 Aug 2023, 19:34,
2 replies,
latest was 2 years ago)
Which bandwagon about a recently deceased chat show host from a landlocked state in the United States was my fault?
Mea culpa Arkansas!
(
The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Fri 18 Aug 2023, 8:36,
Reply)
Which recently deceased chat show host refused to wear anoraks whilst selectively slaughtering silent street performers?
Mime-cull parka-shun!
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 17 Aug 2023, 22:52,
Reply)
Which recently deceased Japanese pansexual chat show host was an abusive park keeper?
Bi Cruel Parkie-san!
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 17 Aug 2023, 22:42,
Reply)
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