This one fits quite nicely...
The Old Man and the Internet

My Dad never had a computer. He retired before they became commonplace in offices and the whole 'internet' thing simply passed him by, until very recently.

A couple of years ago my sister and I decided to get the folks online. We purchased a half-decent PC and sorted a broadband connection.

When everything was setup and working, I sat my 75yr old Dad down for the first time in front of a gleaming, empty Google page and explained how it all worked.

'So I just type what I'm interested in into this section and the computer will give me all the information?' He asked incredulously.

Yup. I replied. It's that simple.

We started with his name. Fortunately it is an unusual name, so the search results were few and surprisingly detailed. We found a family tree published by a US relative, we spent ages on the census site, we tried looking up his old pals on friendsreunited and watched endless youtube clips of 1950's motor racing (he loves that stuff).

I didn't bother with email or anything like that, just gave him the power of Google and left him with his imagination.

A couple of weeks later, I popped in to say hi - but Dad was on the golf course. So I peeked into his study, the PC was on and the BBC weather page was flickering on the screen. Great, I thought, he's really getting into this, checking the beeb for weather forecasts before he heads out to play a round, he's certainly got the hang of this internet lark, I wonder what else he's been up to...

So I checked out his history.

Oh. My. Fucking. God.

I have no father.
( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Thu 22 Mar 2012, 21:51, 9 replies)

So he's just doing what you do?
But not deleting his history.
(Gru being trolled since 1998, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 7:15, closed)

Awkwardness around the inlaws
In the early days of AOL, Mr. Kila volunteered my help to the inlaws when they had some computer problem or other. I checked out some setup window and some history popped up. Oh, my, I said, er, it looks like Jr. Inlaw has been surfing xx...x sites *ahem* (as light dawned on me) well, I'll just click here and change this setting and you should be good to go!

My brother inlaw was fairly choking and his wife was looking in on all of us wondering how we were doing.

He never asked me for help again. It took several months before I could look my inlaws in the face. Still can't look him in the eye, now that I think about it.
( kila is reading clocks upside-down as usual, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 8:50, closed)

You've disowned him?

(wino.NZ The Ayatollah of rock n' rolla..., Fri 23 Mar 2012, 8:58, closed)

Stalking your own father?
Nice.
Is he a weirdo, stalky, on-line bullshit merchant, too?
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 9:22, closed)

My mum sheepishly asked me to clean their computer of all the gay porn popups
She CLAIMS that she accidentally typed "Male" when she meant "Mail"...

Which is odd, because she's normally very good at spelling.
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 10:36, closed)

There's
a lot of you about.
( social hand grenade I was a lurker before you were a lurker, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 12:38, closed)

Sorry, you lot, but I find this fucking hilarious.
None of us like to think of our parents as sexual beings, but honestly they are, and may well have been far more kinky in their day than you are now.

Being confronted by your parent's sexual desires makes one tend to run screaming to scrub with bleach in the shower.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Sat 24 Mar 2012, 0:52, closed)

Put yourself
in your parents' shoes. My Old Man must be DYING to get stuck into some filth on my parents' PC, but he knows full well that I will be able to find out all the disgusting details, thanks to the amount of times that Mum asks me to "have a look at the PC, it's playing up again". They think I'm some sort of computer whizz-kid, far from it, I'll just frig around in Windows until I find what setting she's accidentally changed. It must be hell for him, all that smut, just a click or two away...
(Rsoles, Mon 26 Mar 2012, 10:54, closed)

It was just weird...
He was a teenager in the 50's - so his perversions centered round a very niche and very hard to find set of images / movies. Even weirder were the utterly bizzare search terms he'd use to locate his particular brand of titilation.

For example - for cinema listings he'd type, 'Please can you inform me as to what is playing at the Odeon this afternoon and / or evening?'. His porno search phrases were equal in length and detail and obviously set him off an almighty online goose chase - settings showed over 500 sites visited in a marathon 6hr session.

After that first 'reveal' - I changed everything to delete all histories on exit and set him up with permanent private browsing.

Good luck old man! The apple definitely didn't fall far from the tree.
( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Mon 26 Mar 2012, 11:42, closed)