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This is a question My job: Expectation vs Reality

When I worked as a window cleaner, everybody - and I mean everybody - I knew asked me the "how's yer father" question. The truth was that I was always knackered and freezing, and the only nudity I saw was some fat bloke's arse. Tell us how your work differs from the expectation.

Thanks to Rotating Wobbly Hat for the idea

(I helped save b3ta! Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 8 May 2014, 22:21)
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when i was a child
i expected to be ruling the world by this time, or at least be head of a global empire. instead, my shitty body let me down and i spend my time squinting at MASSIVE letters and avoiding walking into things.
still, gotta laugh, eh?
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 9 May 2014, 14:09, 15 replies)
lol boggle spak eyes

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 9 May 2014, 14:10, closed)
one is greeny-blue and one is hazel today
fuck knows why
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 9 May 2014, 14:23, closed)
one is boggle and the other is spak

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 9 May 2014, 14:25, closed)
best kid's puppet show ever

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 9 May 2014, 14:34, closed)

At least you didn't set your goals as high as owning a pizza oven.

Think how bitterly disappointed you'd be now if you were still forced to order pizza in a restaurant. I wouldn't be able to face myself in the mirror.
(I helped save b3ta! Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Fri 9 May 2014, 14:12, closed)
Interesting...
...presumably you feature quite regularly in the Daily Mirror?
(eViLegion Chief Commissioner of the Scottish Lunacy Board, Fri 9 May 2014, 14:17, closed)
i don't eat pizza

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 9 May 2014, 14:23, closed)
No one would!
Especially if you'd been served the 'Three Olive Burnt Special' - it cost a thousand pounds, you know.

www.b3ta.com/questions/cookbook/post1662409
(I helped save b3ta! Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Fri 9 May 2014, 16:57, closed)
olives are evil and wrong
but each to their own
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 10 May 2014, 12:27, closed)
A bad worksperson blames her tools.
Slacker.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 9 May 2014, 14:49, closed)
if i could see you, i'd kick you

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 9 May 2014, 14:50, closed)
If I wasn't such a wheezing tub of lard,
I'd run away.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 9 May 2014, 14:56, closed)
that's ok, then

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 9 May 2014, 15:05, closed)

i expected to be ruling the world by this time, or at least be head of a global empire. instead, my shitty body let me down and i spend my time squinting at MASSIVE letters and avoiding walking into things.
still, gotta laugh, eh?

running in the night, afraid of what might be
hiding in the dark, hiding in the street, and of what was following me
now hounds of love are hunting
i've always been a coward
and i don't know what's good for me
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 9 May 2014, 15:05, closed)
nothing follows me
except for store detectives
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 9 May 2014, 15:06, closed)

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