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Either you love 'em or you hate 'em. Or in the case of Fred West - both. Tell us your ankle-biter stories.
( , Thu 17 Apr 2008, 15:10)
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Link (sfw)
"A search for foster homes for a herd of goats used in Navy decompression experiments has been launched."
I'm tempted...
I've got an 11-acre field... And a double bed.
( , Mon 21 Apr 2008, 15:30, 18 replies)
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And thought of you, Bert and Al.
And then decided on a moral highground type moment not to link.
Where is this going to go (cringes)?
( , Mon 21 Apr 2008, 15:35, closed)
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*loses power of speech*
*gapes at screen*
*pulls up trousers, turns round, and reads again*
*spluffs uncontrollably on keyboard*
( , Mon 21 Apr 2008, 15:39, closed)
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That means no pesky background checks!
Go for it, Al et al!
( , Mon 21 Apr 2008, 15:48, closed)
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It's too obvious...
Isn't it?
I fucked a boar once...
It squealed like a stuck pig.
Well... You were expecting a goat-related nugget of crudeness, weren't you?
( , Mon 21 Apr 2008, 15:56, closed)
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I've kept goats before....
*thinks about where to fit them*
*wonders about their safety from marauding b3tans*
( , Mon 21 Apr 2008, 16:15, closed)
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*wonders where chickenlady lives*
*begins to make Kid-napping plans*
did you see what I did there? did you? did you?
( , Mon 21 Apr 2008, 16:29, closed)
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have plans afoot for a special goat-carrying harness which I can wear about my person in order to keep them safe from the marauding b3tans (read Bert, Al and Kaol).
Soon I shall patent this and then retire to live in the Secret Wartime Tunnels at Dover Castle.
( , Mon 21 Apr 2008, 16:36, closed)
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I wouldn't sex a goat up.
I don't like mammals, give me a tin of hotdogs any day.
( , Mon 21 Apr 2008, 16:38, closed)
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But......but........
*runs crying from the room*
*turns to monkeys to ease his pain*
( , Mon 21 Apr 2008, 16:59, closed)
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My goats too good for you then?
Eh? Eh?
*pokes monkey with short stabby stick*
( , Mon 21 Apr 2008, 17:06, closed)
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Hotdogs just don't sound the same...
1. Skrink skrink skrink skrink pop tinkle (opening can, natch)
2. Flup (removes central hotdog)
3. Squelch squelch squelch etc
4. Squelch rrrip AAAAAAAAAAiiiiiiiiiieeeee (severs major blood vessel in hampton on sharp edge of can)
5. Fsssssssssss WWAAAAAIIIIII FSSSSSSSS (claret sprays around room from shredded winkie)
6. Crawls to phone. Dies to sound of operator's hysterical laughter......
FIN
Stick to cats. Or goats. If you own a stepladder, even horses. You know it makes sense.
( , Mon 21 Apr 2008, 17:25, closed)
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That had me crossing my legs and I don't even have the necessary equipment!
Ouch!
*EDIT* For some strange reason it also makes me feel incredibly hungry....
( , Mon 21 Apr 2008, 19:09, closed)
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