When I find a snail travelling across the footpath
I put it where it's going so it doesn't get stepped on.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Sat 24 Dec 2011, 10:11, 11 replies)

When I find a snail crossing my garden path
I step on the bugger so it DOESN'T get where it's going :p
( MrSanity has maybe kicked the WoW habit forever, Sat 24 Dec 2011, 10:20, closed)

when i find a homeless person
on the path i put them in the middle of the road so that they can get to where they should be quicker
( fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Sat 24 Dec 2011, 11:49, closed)

The homeless snails are the worst.
Little bastards don't have shells that make a nice crunch but just stick to your shoes instead.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Sat 24 Dec 2011, 16:36, closed)

I pulled the shell off of a snail once to see if it'd go faster
but if anything it was even more sluggish.
(Paolo Nutini's Bikini Better than Frederick Fleet's optometrist, Sat 24 Dec 2011, 17:34, closed)

I pick the slimy little fuckers up and throw them up in a
nice parabolic arc onto the nearest road.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Sat 24 Dec 2011, 11:52, closed)

^^This ^^ is what I did yesterday
to about 60 of the little fuckers
(M61A1 CUPID- STUNTS, Sat 24 Dec 2011, 12:36, closed)

careful now
it's only a matter of time until you see prostitutes (what with their slimy trails and all) as snails to be left mashed up on a road.
( Infidel , shit and wrong, Sat 24 Dec 2011, 18:05, closed)

How do you know where it is going?

( Terry Oblong There's nobody here but us chickens on, Sat 24 Dec 2011, 21:34, closed)

^ This^

(Victor Mildew going apeshit again, (aka, nightprowleroftheweb), Sat 24 Dec 2011, 23:10, closed)

What do you mean?
They leave trails, and you can see which way they're pointed.

I meant I put them on the side of the path that they're heading towards, not that I take them to the specific blade of grass.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Sun 25 Dec 2011, 1:55, closed)

To those who still think it's well 'ard
to step on snails: I have to say your grammar and spelling are excellent for your age.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Sun 25 Dec 2011, 2:02, closed)