In which I am a racist cunt.
I went to a fairly elite all-boys private school.
At one point a young man from South Africa arrived halfway thu the year. His name was Tom and he had the ruddy complexion of those of British descent. With a tow-headed shock of almost white, blonde hair.
Now my dads family has it's roots as Afrikaners and I was born and raised in Zambia so I was no stranger to white Sarf Arfikans.
So I immediately called him "Kaffir". Now altho this term is really racist it was meant clearly as a joke - here is this 6 ft. rugby playing, blonde haired, blue-eyed young fella who is as far removed from being black as is possible.
Tom got the joke, didn't really like it but as he was aware that I was giving him shit he took it on the chin from me. (Remarkable how Aussies and South Africans have a similar outlook and propensity for shit-stirring that seems somewhat deficient in many other nationalities).

That is until one day our resident class ginger - "Bluey" Jefferieson decided to join in.
I had just strolled into class (late as usual). "Hey kaffir, howzit?" I ask Tom. "Yar, net bed." says he in his almost guttural accent. Then Bluey chimes in "How'd you go at the game on the weekend, Kaffir?"
The class room goes very quiet and almost all eyes swing around to Tom. I'm looking at Bluey shaking my head slowly. Tom gets up slowly and advances on Blue. "Wit the fark did yew jist call mi?" he asks. Bluey falters and suddenly realises that he has fucked up monumentally.
"Oh sorry Tom, I just....." the words die in Blue's throat as he sees the glint of what he thinks is murder in Tom's eyes but is actually Tom trying desperately hard not to piss himself laughing.

Tom only stayed at our school for about a year before he got expended and ended up heading off to go and train with the All Blacks Training Squad in New Zealand of all places. About a month before he left he got word from RSA that his sister had given birth to a healthy baby boy.
I took him aside one day at school and told him (loudly enough for anyone else to hear) - "Hey Kaffir, you realise that your sister having a bub makes you 'Uncle Tom'?"
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Sun 24 Feb 2013, 7:44, 9 replies)

jelly.b3ta.com/links/947226
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Sun 24 Feb 2013, 8:48, closed)

Do please feel free to read the subject line you
inbred Pommie fuckwit.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Sun 24 Feb 2013, 9:33, closed)

*Slow handclap*

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Sun 24 Feb 2013, 9:45, closed)

Is that because you have cerebral palsy?

(SSSSSSSSSS, Sun 24 Feb 2013, 10:11, closed)

You're a bit of a thickie, aren't you?

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Sun 24 Feb 2013, 10:17, closed)

Quick, quiet
golf clap.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Sun 24 Feb 2013, 10:43, closed)

One of the most uncomfortable experiences of my gap year in South Africa was going to dinner with an Afrikaner family.
They hated 'kaffirs' and really loved Jesus so we had very little in common to talk about.
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sun 24 Feb 2013, 10:25, closed)

Typical jew

(woocfot friends with Sacha Distel, Sun 24 Feb 2013, 13:11, closed)

Afrikaans is not what I would call a
"pretty" language.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Sun 24 Feb 2013, 21:09, closed)