Ripping yarn
Well, ripping cotton, at any rate.

A few years ago I decided to put my money where my mouth (or rather scrotum) is, and do something positive for the planet. Children are evil, serve no useful purpose (with the sole exception of my nephew, that is. He's ace), and there's no way on earth I'm going to contribute to the overpopulation of the planet by spawning yet another mewling parasite to add to the legions already crowding the place. Came to that realisation almost thirty years ago, and it's still true today.

So I got snipped. The anaesthetic injections hurt like the very devil, but once it took effect I didn't feel a thing. That joke about being macho enough to jog home after a vasectomy isn't much of a joke; it took several hours for the anaesthetic to wear off.

After the doctor had finished messing around down there I asked him if there was anything I needed to know about taking care of the dual wounds he'd just inflicted on me. Should I use bandages? What about antiseptic creams, or anything to reduce the chance of infection? Never mind all that, I was cheerfully told, just wear tight, supportive underwear, and wash at least twice a day.

So I did.

What the kind doctor didn't tell me is that cotton is absorbent, and an open wound (well, a stitched wound) leaks no small amount of fluids, which permeate the fabric touching the wound and dry to a crust. Every time I undressed I ripped the crust off the wounds, causing plenty of pain into the bargain.

Eventually things healed up, but it'd have been nice if I'd been told to, I don't know, put some Elastoplast over it and change that twice a day.
( flake has nothing against your right leg, Thu 11 Mar 2010, 12:54, 11 replies)

Thanks for the tip
... I'm in the queue for the same reasons.
(Biff..., Thu 11 Mar 2010, 13:16, closed)

One thing i wish I'd done -
taken a photo. My scrote was the size and colour of an aubergine for a week. However, I have no idea who I would ever have shown that photo to. One for the family album I suppose.

Haven't put you off, I hope.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Thu 11 Mar 2010, 14:25, closed)

Could have used it for a Facebook avatar.

( flake has nothing against your right leg, Thu 11 Mar 2010, 14:58, closed)

Odd
mine barely "weeped" at all.
Went a weird fucking colour, mind, and ached like a bitch for four days.
But dry as a bone (if you'll pardon the expression).
(greatoldone Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl f'tagn, Thu 11 Mar 2010, 13:23, closed)

Ouch!
The thoughts of my op still make my eyes water and I had it easy compared to you.

The camp, but very helpful, male nurse introduced me to the joys of melolin dressings - Absorbent and non-stick. Still go an infection though, mainly 'cos I ignored the 'take it easy' advice and went back to work. Work involves walking about 4 miles every day. Much chafing and seepage ensued.
(GingerIrishTosser isn't dead yet., Thu 11 Mar 2010, 13:34, closed)

Ouch indeed.
I had a desk job, so not much chafing for me thankfully. Just self-inflicted torture.
( flake has nothing against your right leg, Thu 11 Mar 2010, 14:57, closed)

Thanks.
Mine have just disappeared back up inside me and I think it's going to take some serious coaxing to get them back down again.
( Moey, Thu 11 Mar 2010, 14:21, closed)

You're welcome.
Just talk softly to them; they'll relax in no time.
( flake has nothing against your right leg, Thu 11 Mar 2010, 14:55, closed)

I always get funny looks when I talk to my nuts.
Apparently it's not acceptable behaviour in an open plan office.
( Moey, Thu 11 Mar 2010, 15:05, closed)

Dammit
I am in the market for one of those this year but this has put me right off.

We can put people on the moon but we can't give a bloke the snip without his bollocks swelling up like a grapefruit.
(Tom Jones's Mojo Hasn't had any since, Thu 11 Mar 2010, 16:25, closed)

Actually
we can't put people on the moon any more, either.
(greatoldone Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl f'tagn, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 7:00, closed)