Messing with people's headsTheophilous Thunderwulf says: What have you done to fuck with people? Was it a long, carefully planned piece of psychological warfare, or do you favour quick, off-the-cuff comments that confuse the terminally gullible? Have you been dicked with, and only realised many years later? Are you being dicked right now? Tell us everything.
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 12 Jan 2012, 11:25)
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Young love and the life-changing discovery…During the 90s I was an underachieving adolescent, naive in the way of love. Yet that all changed when we moved house and I found myself on the same street as Jessica.
Jessica was a vibrant young beauty who was two years older than me, and possessed that rare quality of innocence, combined with wisdom that showed maturity beyond her years. Add to this a startlingly pretty face, a sexy, rebellious attitude, and the kind of body that was cumly, yet staggeringly well proportioned…she quickly became the school crush, the kind of girl that the local pervs would perv over, whilst they silently rued the day that they were born, because they were the wrong age for her and had missed their timeline of opportunity…they knew they would never have a chance…but I did. I was the lucky one.
Jessica was also quite new to the neighbourhood, and already there were rumours circulating that she had a ‘secret’ past…yet of course I wasn’t interested in that – all I cared about was the fact that she could teach me things I would never learn in any classroom. However, little did I know or could ever expect, what was to happen in the next few days. I was besotted, completely under her spell…transfixed with a complete sense of purpose as if she was the very thing I was born for.
It started quite by accident – she had dropped her books in the school hallway when there was no-one else around. As she stooped to pick them up I was stunned…my teenage eyes were glued to the sight of the picture-perfect posterior as she bent over to pick up the bag. Yet I was wise enough to realise that this could be construed as un-gentleman-like conduct, so I leapt forward and offered to help her collect her things. She was very appreciative, and gave me a look that burned into my very soul. We got to talking, and despite my crippling shyness I managed to apply a modicum of charm to the conversation. Before I knew it, I found myself invited back to her house that evening.
The rest of the school day seemed to drag forever, but eventually the time came for me to tentatively approach her front door and give it a sturdy knock, trying desperately to not seem too enthusiastic. Jessica quickly answered and informed me that her parents were away for the evening, so we would have hours…just the two of us…alone.
Within moments we were kissing…firmly yet passionately and our hands explored each other...pulling us closer together as we stumbled into her bedroom. We fell onto the bed and began writhing together, our bodies and tongues entwined and our pace quickening, grabbing at each other as we grew more impatient under the pure unadulterated intensity of our feelings. Then, in an effort to regain some control, she gently pushed me away…I considered for a moment that she might be having second thoughts, but then she started smiling seductively, and slowly sliding out of her skirt and her small lace panties, before laying back on the bed. She began to gasp breathlessly as she tenderly inserted her fingers ever-so-gently in and out of herself. As I hurriedly undressed I watched on…quivering in anticipation, and savouring every delicious moment.
‘Come here…be gentle’ she said, coaxing me on with words that were as controlling and purposeful as they were erotic and exhilarating
I approached her but then…as I leaned closer….closer…the most staggering and unexpected thing that I have ever experienced before or since struck me like a thunderbolt. The realisation still now makes me tremble with the sheer, hormone filled shock and awe of it all…It was the single most incredible thing that I, or any other living being was going to experience, and my life was never going to be the same again…
It was…
...
Ooh, time for my break. Maybe I’ll finish the post off when I get back. Maybe.
(, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 11:52, 21 replies)
save yourself the bother.nobody gives a shit.
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janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 12:07,
closed)
Zing!(, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 12:09, closed)
^amen to that^(, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 22:38, closed)
Mills & Boon 101.
(, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 12:10, closed)
Mills and Boon spell "comely" correctly.Although "cumly" seems quite appropriate...
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sanityclause is waiting until, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 15:17,
closed)
That kind of explains...how the spell checker missed it. The spelling was so awful that it couldn't even find an alternative for my crappy effort - but in my defence I do use the word 'cum' a lot :)
I currently can't be bothered to ninja edit. Hey, I can't even be bothered to log myself out as pooflake and back in again as Mr Twisty Cheeky.
hey ho...
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Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Mon 16 Jan 2012, 15:37,
closed)
Don't worry.I'm done.
(, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 12:52, closed)
I think your account's been hacked by KWA.(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 13:13,
closed)
Huh!Well, I don't. My 1990s were a teensy bit more grown up than this!
(, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 14:21, closed)
Tax returns and mortgage applications?Ding dong!
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monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 16:46,
closed)
A break? you mean you finished your wank and cant be bothered to finish the story.(
6821isnotmyPIN Bored cig., Mon 16 Jan 2012, 13:22,
closed)
Zing!(, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 22:38, closed)
errrrrdid she have a cock?
(, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 13:52, closed)
All of the above comments are true...Except that one.
:)
(, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 14:48, closed)
I wouldmodify the nonce alarm, so that it picks up virgins, but it'd probably explode, after this.
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monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 16:11,
closed)
ouch!such hostility!
Is it /talk's time of the month? Do they feel bloated and blotchy???
(, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 16:16, closed)
Careful now...Down with this sort of thing etc.
one person's opinion is as valid as the next - Even if some of those opinions state that what I post is a steaming pile of wank.
Righty, I'm orf to sing 'we are the world'...
(, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 16:27, closed)
You may think that you have messed with our heads here by finishing that erotic story mid-thrust....... but I twice managed to knock-one-out before I got to the end...
(, Mon 16 Jan 2012, 16:49, closed)
Isn't it easier to say 'knocked two out'?(
Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Mon 16 Jan 2012, 20:42,
closed)
"7 with 1 blow!"(, Tue 17 Jan 2012, 7:01, closed)
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