And said that the only way to make it better
Is to be allowed to have a go on one of her mates. The fit one, not the one who comfort eats every time a guy doesn't put an 'x' at the end of a text message.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:25, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Clicking this, despite myself
You're on excellent form this morning sir.

*contemplates which of Ms Foxtrot's mates is most lengthworthy*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:26, Reply)

I am prepared to shag an apology to you out of your missus.
That's how much I care.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:29, Reply)

WHY WOULD YOU CHEAT ON LUSTY YOU FUCK

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:30, Reply)

I don't want to. I'm just trying to help out a friend in need.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:35, Reply)

This is very big of you
Speaking of which, how tall are you? Just need to know if I should get the stepladder out
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:39, Reply)

Does she have a musky anus?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:41, Reply)

6'2", but I have disappointingly short thighs.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:47, Reply)

You'll probably be alright then
Shave though. She hates facial hair
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:50, Reply)

She's not supposed to enjoy it.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:53, Reply)

For some reason I thought about this seriously for a second
and concluded that the two of you would probably make excellent intellectual sparring partners

I have no idea why I thought that
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:57, Reply)

Cheers!
Make sure you rate each of her friends in several categories, using your missus as a Control. You have to be scientific about this.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:34, Reply)

Right now I'm going with Natalie
Same height, also blonde, similar figure, bigger tits. Nowhere near as pretty though. Lend me a brown bag?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:38, Reply)

I like how you say these thinsg
yet you would never ever ever even think of doing it yourself. Even when the people you go out with are massive ssunts (shoe shopping cunts)
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:29, Reply)

You never even met her, but you hate her

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:32, Reply)

Yeah I'm going to have to play my
"Awesome At Judging People Which Even You Have To Admit Is Actually A Trufax" card
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:35, Reply)

You are a harsh judge with your gravel
She wasn't right for me, but she's not a massive cunt.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:37, Reply)

vetoed

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:38, Reply)

I think if we took your opinions on someone, crossed them with mine, we'd hit the truth.

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:45, Reply)

You're a massive ssunt.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:35, Reply)

Where's Monty Balyce?
I like him a lot more
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:37, Reply)

He's better looking too
Which isn't saying much: obese cavalier vs that Nazi officer who drank from the wrong cup.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:39, Reply)

Hahaha
IndianaJonesandtheLastCrusadeLolz
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:40, Reply)

wrong furry
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 9:43, Reply)