Alt:
'Monty is by far the brightest and most popular-with-da-bitchez student in the history of the school. When not duffing up the hardest boy in the 5th year he can usually be found boffing Miss Dudley (you know, the fit music teaching assistant with the EPIC GAZONGAS) in the music cupboard, yet amazingly his work is simply first-rate, in actual fact we're paying him £1000 an hour to write the text books for next year's intake.'

This is genuinely word for word what my report said, loads of times.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 Mar 2011, 14:43, 4 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Was the word "GAZONGAS" popularised in the 1950s?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Mar 2011, 14:45, Reply)

Are you suggesting I am making some or all of this up?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 Mar 2011, 14:47, Reply)

Yes.
And that you're old.

You must be gobsmacked.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 9 Mar 2011, 14:49, Reply)

The 1750s

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 9 Mar 2011, 14:49, Reply)

'by far the brightest and most popular-with-da-bitchez student in the history of the school. When not duffing up the hardest boy in the 5th year he can usually be found boffing Miss Dudley (you know, the fit music teaching assistant with the EPIC GAZONGAS) in the music cupboard, yet amazingly his work is simply first-rate, in actual fact we're paying him £1000 an hour to write the text books for next year's intake.' a predatory homosexual with a Nazi fixation.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 9 Mar 2011, 14:47, Reply)

d spl
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 9 Mar 2011, 14:48, Reply)

'although we do have to ask him
to refrain from playing Wet, Wet, Wet at such loud volumes, as a mating call to attract other homosexuals'
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 9 Mar 2011, 14:48, Reply)