I found my wife staring at a bottle of orange juice yesterday
When questioned as to why she was doing this, she replied," Urrggghh" as she'd had a massive stroke and was paralysed in that position.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Mar 2011, 16:23, 4 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Hahahahhahahahahahaha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Mar 2011, 16:24, Reply)

*CLICK*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Mar 2011, 16:26, Reply)

^ what she said

(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Tue 22 Mar 2011, 16:27, Reply)

His wife?
Mrs Deacon
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Mar 2011, 16:28, Reply)

By dame's mot Deaconnnnnmmmm.
edit: my shoe's fallen off *twisty-sad-face*
(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Tue 22 Mar 2011, 16:29, Reply)

Don't worry.
I'm sure Janet Ellis will fish it out of the sea for you.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Mar 2011, 16:33, Reply)

Only if she isn't too busy getting Percy Thrower to call rival gardeners 'mentally ill'

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 22 Mar 2011, 16:34, Reply)

That fucking Titchmarsh is a fucking psycho, mate.
He even poured oil in the pond.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Mar 2011, 16:37, Reply)

What a cunt

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Mar 2011, 16:38, Reply)

He has got worse.
Ever since he got Dimmock addicted to crack, he has been pimping her out. She'll turn tricks your soil over for thirty quid.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 22 Mar 2011, 16:42, Reply)

I took my wife on holiday last week.
Jamaica?

No, some secluded woodland on the outskirts of Epping Forest. I bludgeoned her to death with a mattock and buried her in a shallow makeshift grave.

LOL!
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Mar 2011, 16:35, Reply)