One of my own
Retire, I thought for thou art young,
And canst frolic in the woodlands with the hounds,
Little did I know the angst thus brung,
By those who knew that I was kicking 'rounds.

"A little job" said Bill, a mate of old,
An easy Sunday morning cash in hand,
And I did take it, for the truth be told,
I'm a bugger for cash on demand.

Partition wall and plaster board to strip,
An easy job for any handyman,
But this bastard one was well beyond our grip,
And it fucked us like no cheap job ever can.

For these walls were held in place with solid beams,
And battened in with solid bolts of steel,
A big big job - so looking at it seems,
And an even bigger hoplessness we feel.

But as we stared despondant at the bolt blanks,
There came a thought, which could not have been kinder,
I rushed off home and silently I gave thanks,
To the man who invented the fuck-off angle-grinder.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sun 24 Apr 2011, 21:03, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Alright TD

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Apr 2011, 21:09, Reply)

Not bad - knackered though
All of the above is true - I've spent the day taking a plasterboard partition wall out via the very unconventional means of a circular saw and angle grinder.

We found an empty pack of Players No 6 stuffed in the back of it.

Whoever put it up meant it to last.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sun 24 Apr 2011, 21:18, Reply)

Swapping their homework for footwork,
Kicking the ball till its dark,

Here go Jossy's Giants,
Footballs just a branch of science,
Head the ball, now Jossy calls...

Jossy's Giants!!??

Dependable, Reliant
Put your faith in Jossy's Giants
Get stuck in, we're gonna win...

Jossy's Giants!!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Apr 2011, 21:41, Reply)

Good stuff
I once wrote a Petrarchan Sonnet for a long distance girlfriend.

Never ended up actually meeting her, which is a pity because Petrarch was a cunt and that format is really fucking hard.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sun 24 Apr 2011, 21:11, Reply)

It's OK
I have a rather large doggerel project in my head, and because doggerel doesn't follow any form it'll be very difficult to keep it restrained.

Maybe, maybe not.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sun 24 Apr 2011, 21:32, Reply)