I'm pretty sure this is futhur reason for you to move in with me.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 20:55, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

You could operate a similar system, whereby you limit Amberls time watching a Channel 4 soap.
You should call this training scheme 'Hollystrokes'
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 20:57, Reply)

You could also use this name where you link her soap opea watching with the number of handjobs she gives.

(Bazongaloid, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:08, Reply)

Eugh thanks for that Al

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:10, Reply)

And on weekends, they could watch, 'Strictly Cum Wanking'

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:11, Reply)

And on thursday they could watch "How I became your mother" and "The Big Bang Theory*"

* This one doesn't require any changes to be funny as I'm implying that a "big bang" is sex.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:16, Reply)

And every day, in the early evening, they could have another couple over for 'adult fun'
4 in a bed lolz.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:17, Reply)

And at the weekend they could put on More4 and have a long period of blowjobs and snowballing
when "Cum Dine With Me" is on.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:19, Reply)

hahaha
And on a weekend, they could sit back and discuss their favourite cum-shots whilst dancing about to the music on 'Top of the Pops Replayed'.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:20, Reply)

On saturday evenings, they could get a judging panel to rate their sex moves while watching "The XXX Factor"

(Bazongaloid, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:24, Reply)

Sunday, they could invite their favourite gay over and watch Top Queer.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:26, Reply)

(Bazongaloid, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:30, Reply)

hahahaha

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:36, Reply)

Nothing wrong with a nice cup of soup

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:10, Reply)

It's a hug in a mug.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:10, Reply)

I had soup twice yesterday
The first was tomato and basil, the second was smoked chicken. Both were excellent, but the second was followed with a plate of coq au vin, then a creme brulee then somthing like a metric fuckton of gin.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:11, Reply)

Soup-er.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:11, Reply)

That sounds lovely
you bastard. Though yesterday I ate what felt like a metric ton of food, only to realise it was about five hundred calories.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:13, Reply)

That's a good thing surely?

(Bazongaloid, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:15, Reply)

It was. But I'm still off alcohol
and anything nice or sweet, so it was basically a lot of chicken and turkey
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:21, Reply)

You do realise that eating high protein diets makes your shit stink
and doesn't really provide sufficient nutrients.

I'm worried you're verging into Rachelswipe-esqe territory in your pursuit of weight loss. Please don't try any kind of lemon juice based "detox". Or indeed any kind of "detox".
(Bazongaloid, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:23, Reply)

I really want to be a dress size smaller for my birthday
and I've got sufficient willpower to keep this up for as long as necessary. And I'm not eating much protein, the chicken night was an aberration.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:25, Reply)

Christ. You must be desperate!
You've eaten a OT poster of Spanish origin.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:27, Reply)

Delicious protein
very Mediterranean
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:28, Reply)

Comes with it's own little person inside for dessert.

(Bazongaloid, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:30, Reply)

Like a human beef wellington.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:35, Reply)

Now I have the four and twenty blackbirds
nursery rhyme in my head
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:43, Reply)

And I don't know why you have that in your head.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:45, Reply)

The pie with a smaller pie inside
for the courtiers to eat, and the 24 blackbirds between the small pie and the crust
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:52, Reply)

Well I never.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:55, Reply)