me neither
and yet i've been asked to do it on several occasions. eeeow. on one occasion i faked it with a sponge. he fell for it when drunk, but the morning after i got rumbled.

i suspect he was actually relieved.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 19:20, 2 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Eew Monty you dirty, dirty boy.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 19:20, Reply)

Why does this sound dirtier than a chimney sweep's armpit?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 19:22, Reply)

Your mind swipe, your mind is smuttier than the top shelf in Londis.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 19:28, Reply)

sponges aren't dirty
except when thy've been round someone's arse, i guess
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 19:22, Reply)

Succinct and accurate summary, goodly wench

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 19:23, Reply)

ahahaha
sponge fakery. I have never been asked, fortunately. Ball licking, yes. Starfish sucking, no.
(berk, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 19:23, Reply)

Ball licking is fine
As is gentle sucking or whatever is required.

But barking spider lovin'?

HELL NO.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 19:24, Reply)

the respectable looking old chap i'm sat next to on the train
has just caught sight of this conversation. Poor bastard looks both shocked and faintly ill now.
(berk, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 19:30, Reply)

haha, serves him right for snooping
HEY! GUY NEXT TO BERK! YOU SMELL OF WEE AND LIKE TO LIVK BUMHOLES!
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 19:32, Reply)

he's just jealous

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 19:38, Reply)