b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » Off Topic » Post 1475070 | Search
This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Pages: Latest, 836, 835, 834, 833, 832, ... 1

« Go Back | Popular

Noel's Christmas Presents in on at 6.30
I'm going to watch it and get all misty eyed.

What b3ta would you treat to something special, what would it be and why them?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:17, 131 replies, latest was 14 years ago)
If fiona bruce was a B3tan, she would be treated to a cockgaz.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:25, Reply)
Myself.
A nice oily wank.

Because I haven't had a tug for days.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:32, Reply)
oily?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:35, Reply)
Baby oil.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:36, Reply)
not engine oil, then?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:37, Reply)
I've ran out.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:43, Reply)
Engine oil is very expensive as well.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:47, Reply)
wanking is a good cause, though

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:51, Reply)
i don't have a good answer for your question
this distresses me.

I suppose the question is what do b3tans really want?
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:38, Reply)
Well make something up then!

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:47, Reply)
i meant as in
i couldn't think up a good answer made up or funny or poiniant or anything. Perhaps I'd just get everyone some nice socks
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:50, Reply)
Well you've had a bit of time to thing now.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:54, Reply)
still nothin
and now I feel all pressurised.
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:56, Reply)
Well get something for Blousie. Because she is all types of awesome.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:57, Reply)
*stands in front of shop shelves flapping*
*buys nearest thing in a panic*
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:01, Reply)
Oooh, where's b3th.
There is a pub landlady on Noel's Christmas Pressies from Weston Super Mare.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:02, Reply)
how is it on today?
I thought it was supposed to be on on Christmas day morning
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:07, Reply)
It's on Sky One
I'm guessing it'll get repeated on Christmas day.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:09, Reply)
Noel sold out to Murdock?!

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:10, Reply)
And B.A and Face and Hannibal.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:12, Reply)
well they do come as a team

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:12, Reply)
I love it when a pun comes together.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:14, Reply)
I'd treat you to an expensive corgi Jeff
for a right royal fuck.
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:52, Reply)
WooHoo!
How is Ireland this wintery evening?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:53, Reply)
Cold. It's my sister's birthday though so I have cake
How are you?
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:55, Reply)
I've lost my voice.
I blame going out drinking lots over a number of nights. I hope it comes back though. I'm suppose to be going out tomorrow.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 18:57, Reply)
Anything especially nice?

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:37, Reply)
Nah, just a work thing.
It's good form to show your face at these little shindigs.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:43, Reply)
I wouldn't know ;)
by the way I've applied for a short business course specifically to get some of the skills I might need for the idea I had
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:48, Reply)
Outstanding move.
When does it start?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:51, Reply)
They haven't got back to me
but it runs more or less continually I think, and has the plus side of being free. The job centre said they'd sort it for me, after I suggested it
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:52, Reply)
Fantastic work.
What a positive step to have taken.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:58, Reply)
Thanks, I really appreciate your advice on it

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:46, Reply)
With minimal overheads
You've nothing to lose.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:06, Reply)
I just want everyone to be happy and contented.
Apart from Quentin.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:42, Reply)
*Offers Blousie the Quality Street tin*

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:46, Reply)
*picks out the purple and the green ones*

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:47, Reply)
you're a wrong'un
Strawberry delight and orange creme. I also miss the coffee one
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:48, Reply)
Blurghe!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:49, Reply)
I think this also points to our different taste in men
Matt Bomer is clearly a strawberry creme
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:51, Reply)
Oooooh, you were *this* close.
The coffee ones are evil.

Strawberry and orange creams, fudge, and that coconut one.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:50, Reply)
I like coffee sweets
even not very good coffee sweets
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:58, Reply)
see, I don't like milk in my coffee
so I generally don't like coffee chocolates.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:58, Reply)
i used to hate the creme ones
but now I would kill for a strawberry delight
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:55, Reply)
You lot are fussy fuckers.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:59, Reply)
Oh thank god.
I recorded a message for that, but it got cut. That pub in WsM that was on is my local.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:49, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1475091
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:52, Reply)
Well, there you go.
I recorded a piece for her about our computers for spastics club, but luckily it got cut, so I didn't have to look like a complete tit on national telly.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:54, Reply)
You should have gone to the pub for the lunch.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:56, Reply)
I was at an auction the other side of Wellington that day.
I did see the kitchen fitters though.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:58, Reply)
Were you drawn to them because they were from Magnet

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:59, Reply)
Good thing I wore my corset
for I fear my sides may have split.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:00, Reply)
You've really got it about you this evening.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:03, Reply)
I've just realised I didn't answer your question.
A certain b3tan will actually find out in the next couple of days what I would give them as a treat....
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:56, Reply)
Jeff's getting a shit through his letterbox?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 19:59, Reply)

letter dirt
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:00, Reply)
Here's your coat

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:00, Reply)
You are like the anti-Barry

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:04, Reply)
You mean she has morals but poor dress sense?

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:05, Reply)
This is entirely true

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:30, Reply)
And this Is why I like you better than him.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:32, Reply)
Woo hoo!
Am I your fourth favourite weirdo off the internet then?
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:34, Reply)
Hang on. Am I being dissed here?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:36, Reply)
He said darth was his third favourite
Obviously we know blousie is no 1, so you could be second...
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:37, Reply)
I think I said maybe
I was purposefully not exact, there are too many lovely people for my to start picking favourites.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:39, Reply)
Nicely backtracked

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:41, Reply)
Why thankyou.
I really don't have rankings but some are easy, you I like, Barry makes an entertaining soap opera but strikes me as a horror of a human being.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:44, Reply)
Do I qualify as both?

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:20, Reply)
I'd treat Blousie with her vary own Jeff Bridges.
Or another man of equal or greater value.

It would make her happy and she deserves it.

Evening all.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:03, Reply)
Evening CQ

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:11, Reply)
Oright Jeff.
How's Tricks?
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:12, Reply)
Meh
You had a good weekend?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:14, Reply)
Pretty good
Had my boy for our little pre-Christmas celebration, we had lots of good clean fun and I was reassured that small gifts well chosen are still appreciated which is nice. generally all good, but I could do with an early night
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:18, Reply)
You always claim to need an early night.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:19, Reply)
Yes, I do seem to be perma tired.
I suck at going to bed early and always have. I'm far better at lying in but I so rarely get the chance. Basically my sleep patterns are at odds with the rest of the world.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:24, Reply)
Oh and I was woken up at 5:30 this morning by a boy that had wet the bed.
That may be a factor.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:29, Reply)
Pfft!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:48, Reply)
Bless you.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:50, Reply)
Don't you come all 'I don't know what's she talking about' now : )
Good weekend then?
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:53, Reply)
Not coming anything
Yeah good weekend, if tiring I've decided to reward myself not with an early night but with a late morning tomorrow. Thank heavens for flexitime.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:55, Reply)
My nephew stayed over last night and drove my potty but in a good way : )

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:59, Reply)
Cool, sounds like we had similar weekends.
How's you doing?
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:59, Reply)
I would treat kristine to a nice massage from a sexy man and then a hair shampooing, and scalp rubbing

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:21, Reply)
Evening K
How are you?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:22, Reply)
and socks?
did you want socks?
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:44, Reply)
I need socks
and pants. I hope Santa brings me new underwear this year.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:46, Reply)
which political icon
will be on your pants this year?
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:48, Reply)
Sadtimes, my Lenin boxers are falling apart.
I doubt I can find another pair like them.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 20:49, Reply)
So are you dressing to the left?

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:04, Reply)
Always.
Anything else would be bourgeois and ideologically unsound.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:07, Reply)
Have you asked Putin?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:04, Reply)
I'll send him a text.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:07, Reply)
Russian underpants are rubbish
'Cos Chernobyl fallout.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:08, Reply)
*wince*
LTI Jeff, LTI
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:09, Reply)
I've not had a LTI in ages.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:10, Reply)
I sucked air through my teeth and everything, it was that bad.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:14, Reply)
I handed you your coat a while back.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:14, Reply)
I love that joke

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:33, Reply)
I would treat everybody to Radio Dozer, and an autographed 2012 Dozer calendar.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:07, Reply)
Man I thought you liked us, well some of us anyhow.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:09, Reply)
Wut? Those presents are for the people I like.
For those I don't, I will sign them up to spankyhanky's weekly creative writing email.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:11, Reply)
Can I be on the not-like list please Mr Doze?
I miss Spanky.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:13, Reply)
You are at the top of the 'dislike' list.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:32, Reply)
*happydance*
But I like you Mr. Doze..... *sadface*
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:35, Reply)
Since when?
I thought we have a comedy 'hate-hate' relationship, you know, like Nick Griffin and David Lammy.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:37, Reply)
Well, yes.....
But tis the season and all that... and I can't help a sneaking fondness for you you caledonian cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:39, Reply)
Is it because of my impeccable bone structure?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:39, Reply)
I've seen one small, alleged photo of you, hardly enough to judge.
I think it's because you're a difficult argumentative wrong-headed stubborn bastard. You could almost be family.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:44, Reply)
If you were my family I would leave the fucking UK entirely.
Hope this helps.

xxx
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:46, Reply)
Aww Doze, don't fight the love man, don't fight the love.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:47, Reply)
I am trying to suppress a boner even as I type.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:48, Reply)
Dirty homosexualist.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:50, Reply)
You can talk.
Your screenname has a Q in it, which is of course the first letter of the word 'quender'.

Therefore, you are a botter.

SCIENCE IN ACTION.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:51, Reply)
Real-LOL
I bat for any team that'll have me, as is well known.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:52, Reply)
So you don't bat at all then?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:53, Reply)
Not lately.
This does not make your offer any more attractive.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:54, Reply)
R U sure?
lolz.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:55, Reply)
Yes, sorry Dze, a man has to have standards, as I'm sure you appreciate.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:56, Reply)
Lol

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:52, Reply)
Can't I be on the neutral list and get neither?

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:18, Reply)
Nope. One or the other.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:32, Reply)
Night all.
Breasts.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:58, Reply)
Have a nice Quend.
I mean sleep.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 22:00, Reply)
I've just had a bowl of soup

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 21:59, Reply)
I've just had a quender.
Lovely lovely quending.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 22:02, Reply)
Underground overground quendering free
The P to the D loves Quix-o-te(e).
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 22:04, Reply)
Hardly.
Men with moustaches look like pederasts.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 22:05, Reply)
Talking of rasts
Did you see the news this evening?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 22:39, Reply)
No. Why?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 22:43, Reply)
You can now get a patoir bible
It be makin a dull ting good.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 22:45, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=mJKYgiR1FcA&feature=related
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 18 Dec 2011, 22:47, Reply)

« Go Back | Reply To This »

Pages: Latest, 836, 835, 834, 833, 832, ... 1