Morning all!
It's Sunday, the sun is shining, the snow has gone and all seems well with the world (except Mali but they don't count - part French y'see).
So, my fellow B3TANS, what lays in store for you on this fine day? A spot of cookery? DIY perhaps? Or, are you lying in bed groaning with a mahoosive hangover? Tell us all that we may sympathise/offer advice/mercilessly take the piss.
Alt: Best insult you've heard recently. Or something - I dunno.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:24, 52 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

I'm at work all day so today's gonna be totes dull
An then I'll just go home and plan for my CRAZY WEEKEND*

*I'm buying a new kettle
( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:29, Reply)

hello the lovely Theo ban.
I need a new kettle. the inside of the student one is gross. I want one just for me.

Also, to answer CP, I met a family who need a part time nanny and start next monday, and I had a friend over. Good day.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:41, Reply)

Woot! Nice one - hope the nannying works with the studies.

(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:44, Reply)

should do, I just have to pick the kids up from school two afternoons a week (occaisionally three days, but not often),
and I help them with their homework, if their clothes are too dirty I chuck them in the machine. Play some games with them. start making dinner for them. Should be fun!
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:45, Reply)

I think I'm going to buy this one Lady Poppets
http://www.argos.ie/static/Product/partNumber/9064315/c_1/1|category_root|Kitchen+and+laundry|14418476/c_2/3|cat_19780844|Kettles|14418611.htm

Because 1) It looks hideous and 2) one of my flatmates is a proper emo girl thing who only likes black, so it might nark her

Same reason if I buy the bog roll I buy pink stuff
( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:55, Reply)

that is a freaking AWESOME kettle.
I love it. It appeals to my sense of kitsch.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:57, Reply)

I don't think you can make a cup of tea with that kettle and not smile

( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:58, Reply)

you could try this one?
www.argos.ie/static/Product/partNumber/9060670/c_1/1|category_root|Kitchen+and+laundry|14418476/c_2/3|cat_19780844|Kettles|14418611.htm

Same kettle, just different colour scheme.

Why do you want to nark your flatmate, by the way?
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:00, Reply)

Holy shit that might be even better
Because it amuses me. Black clothes, godawful emo music by floppy haired cunts with black eyeliner on, black food bowls even(!) but when it's tea time, the kettle is a joyful cheery polka dot thing.
( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:03, Reply)

I fucking LOVE that kettle.
If we had Argos here in Australia, it would be MINE. ALL MINE.

Aha that's a fair enough reason too! Tea time should not be miserable, it should be a happy, calm event. Like today! My friend came over and we had big mugs of tea and a girly chat. was fun.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:05, Reply)

Yeah fink I'll have to pick it up tomorrow
I just think that stuff around the house should be fun and lighthearted, if your stuff is a joy, it might make your life a ltitle bit more pleasant? I dunno.

But not in a Colin way
( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:07, Reply)

no point in having a miserable house if you can make it bright and cheerful
My room on campus when I moved in, looked like a prison cell. White painted brick wall, identical furniture to everything else, and no wall hangings. I've put bright scarves up, a painting on the wall, pictures and art up to make it a nicer place.

My room is the best in the whole house.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:09, Reply)

See that sounds nice
MORE CHEER IN ALL THINGS I SAY
*bangs desk*
( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:09, Reply)

well it's a small room so there's only so much I can do.
but I have a vase in the window that almost always has flowers in it for people to see from outside. And a red lantern that hangs from the ceiling, and makes the room glow all pretty.

it's not hard to make a place feel like a home if you want to!
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:12, Reply)

I need to tidy up my room, it's a right ol tip
I mean it's clean in the middle just got shelves full of shit
Like a colour changing lamp, a string of coloured light stuff, a penis shaped bottle opener, a bit metal box, a hellboy statue, a broken mayor from nightmare before christmas

I'm shit at chucking shit out
( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:14, Reply)

my room is always neat and clean.
a good de-clutter did wonders for me!

but the main reason is that I hate mess. it bothers me. a lot.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:17, Reply)

I tend to shove stuff in cupboards and forget about them for years
I've got a bag of clothes I brought over from France that I haven't opened in three years, I dunno even what's in there, I daren't look now
( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:20, Reply)

I had a similar thing.
when I got back from europe, I got fat. had to put all my jeans away.
today I realised I fit into my size 7 jeans again.

Ecstatic does not do it justice.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:22, Reply)

europe does that to you
that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it
( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:23, Reply)

no I mean, I was skinny when I was in europe,
and I got back to Australia, started being a sedentary, tertiary student, and I got fat.
I have officially lost 15kgs(33lbs) since september.
not a fatty anymore! haha
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:27, Reply)

Hooray then!
The continent of Europe relaxes, knowing it's not getting the blame this time.
Next time Europe, next time.
( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:34, Reply)

Is it too soon to nominate subthread of the year?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:15, Reply)

I think you're being sarcastic. Are you being sarcastic?

(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:16, Reply)

who cares
lets take the prize and fuck off before they realise
( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:17, Reply)

*takes prize*
*shakes hands with Theoban*
*weeps during acceptance speech*
*runs away*
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:18, Reply)

I'd like to thank my mum, and god, and Godmum, devourer of worlds, ancient destroyer of hope, bane of the deep

( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:19, Reply)

personally, I'd like to that all the business that let me steal their business cards and post cards to create a wall of travelling adventures.
And I'd also like my friends, for letting have goofy pictures of them framed and hanging on the wall.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:21, Reply)

I like the idea of her emerging from her emo cave and giving a sad little grunt of dismay at the new kettle
It will be exquisite.
( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:05, Reply)

ood '
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:58, Reply)

+ mite

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:03, Reply)

Morning.
I'm sitting in a car in a car park in York with a sleeping baby.
I have a slight hangover, but am hoping to cure that with a pint with dozer later on.

Alt: There was an attempt not long ago to turn Captain Placid into an insult.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:43, Reply)

I'm going to trick you into thinking I'm a black guy with natty dreads.
The only problem with this plan is that there are no black people in York.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:46, Reply)

You should be easy to spot then.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:50, Reply)

Tangles is quite tall.
So you might want to wear your heels.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:59, Reply)

I might wear heels to make him seem even shorter.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:16, Reply)

I have a pair of 6 inch stilettos you can borrow if you like.
They're purple and leather. and have pointy toes.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:20, Reply)

Ok.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:24, Reply)

hello tangles.
have a pint for me will you? I need one.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:46, Reply)

I fail to see how any beer I drink will have any effect on you.
I mean, I'll try, but I'm only going to have the one as I need to drive home later.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:55, Reply)

'Sup Tangles
A pint is always a good idea with a hangover - even better is a 'kill or cure' breakfast. As I have no alcohol left in the house after last night I went for the breakfast option. So far it seems to have worked.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:51, Reply)

I had a shit hotel breakfast earlier, which didn't help enough.
I'm glad it was included in the cheapo deal we had for the hotel.
I resent being charged a tenner for a breakfast where I have to make my own toast and help myself to drying out food from under a hot plate, half of which is meat anyway.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:02, Reply)

I agree, hotel breakfasts are, by and large, grim.
As I'm a committed carnivore I can normally get by but it must be difficult for vegetarians.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:19, Reply)

I don't mind paying for a decent freshly cooked one.
I do limit my selection, but better hotels usually have more options.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:24, Reply)

You should give the baby back before the fuzz catches up to you

( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 11:56, Reply)

Where do you think would be the best place to leave it?
Bit risky trying to leave it outside a police station, I think.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:06, Reply)

Do nuns not take kids in anymore?
The last time I had to drop a kid off it was in the 50s
( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:08, Reply)

It must have been different, what with you growing up in Ireland and that.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:13, Reply)

RIGHT I'M FLOUNCING

( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:15, Reply)

NO! COME BACK O'BAN! WE MISS U!!!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:19, Reply)

I don't even like bombing fish and chip shops!

( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:21, Reply)

going out for dim sum in a bit then making parkin

(PsychoChomp, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:21, Reply)

nah it's quite bright sun out

( Theoban What of it, Sun 27 Jan 2013, 12:21, Reply)