I heard that Tower Hamlets council banned apples so as not to offend Muslims.
That's what I heard.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:26, 3 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Haha

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:27, Reply)

Only British Apples.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:29, Reply)

lol
Hey Monty. I'm in that London in 2 weeks.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:29, Reply)

You shall be fed and watered like the KING you are.
And housed, should the need be.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:31, Reply)

Do you ever find yourself round my neck of the woods, Vindus?

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:31, Reply)

There is only 1 of our pubs in Portsmouth,
The Smith and Wesson. I've only been once. But I might make a trip when the weather cheers up.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:34, Reply)

Nice friendly name, for a nice friendly town.
The best pub in Pompey is the Mother Shipton and when I say 'best' I mean 'best if you like having your teeth pulled out with pliers in the car park'.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:36, Reply)

That lovely little place was mentioned in Sky 1's "Britains Hardest Pubs"
So proud.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:37, Reply)

My Mrs is from Portsmouth.
She is the metaphorical equivalent of bringing a gun to a knife fight. Hold on, the other one, she brings guns to knife fights.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:39, Reply)

Is she from Portsmouth
or "from Portsmouth"?
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:40, Reply)

What's the diff?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:43, Reply)

Pompey birds are fucking awful
But not all girls from Portsmouth are pompey birds
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:49, Reply)

Pompey bird, innit.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 14:03, Reply)

Between that place and the Tricorn Centre you got yo'self a purdy liddle town, boah.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:40, Reply)

Not anymore, the Tricorn's long gone
they pulled it down and replaced it with....another car park.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:41, Reply)

I thought it was a listed building for some insane reason

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:46, Reply)

You do that
and fucking give me a shout. Prick.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:36, Reply)

last time I went to Portsmouth, none of you came to say hello.
Balders ducked out, Mano was busy and you were with your stupid family. I ended up having to go for a nice romantic meal in a lovely restaurant with ladypig, instead of a mini pompey bash.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:41, Reply)

None of that is my fault
Next time I won't be spending time with my family, that's for the sure
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:51, Reply)

is this some kind of advanced warning so monty can warn all the muslims?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:31, Reply)

They have 24h fatwa shops these days.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:33, Reply)

Decapitate you at the drop of a hat.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:35, Reply)

The police won't investigate either, which is handy.
They just don't care.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:36, Reply)

The Old Bill are out catching real criminals.
Not all that brown honour killing shit.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:37, Reply)

They think 'acid attack' is a dance record from '88

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:39, Reply)

Hahahahahahaha.
Aciiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeed.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:40, Reply)

I wish you weren't out to dinner this evening YOU SELFISH PRICK

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:40, Reply)

I know. I am a terrible cunt.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:44, Reply)

Don't sell youself short. You are a quite jaw-dropping cunt.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 12 Mar 2013, 13:45, Reply)