Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 18:52,
53 replies,
latest was 12 years ago)
anybody else seen this crock of shit on facebook?Letter to Mr. Cameron - Genius!!
Dear Mr. Cameron,
Please find below our suggestion for fixing the UK 's economy.
Instead of giving billions of pounds to banks that will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan.
You can call it the Patriotic Retirement Plan:
There are about 10 million people over 50 in the work force.
Pay them £1 million each severance for early retirement with the following stipulations:
1) They MUST retire.
Ten million job openings - unemployment fixed
2) They MUST buy a new British car.
Ten million cars ordered - Car Industry fixed
3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage -
Housing Crisis fixed
4) They MUST send their kids to school/college/university -
Crime rate fixed
5) They MUST buy £100 WORTH of alcohol/tobacco a week .....
And there's your money back in duty/tax etc
It can't get any easier than that!
P.S. If more money is needed, have all members of parliament pay back their falsely claimed expenses and second home allowances
If you think this would work, please forward to everyone you know.
Also.....
Let's put the pensioners in jail and the criminals in a nursing home.
This way the pensioners would have access to showers, hobbies and walks.
They'd receive unlimited free prescriptions, dental and medical treatment, wheel chairs etc and they'd receive money instead of paying it out.
They would have constant video monitoring, so they could be helped instantly, if they fell, or needed assistance.
Bedding would be washed twice a week, and all clothing would be ironed and returned to them.
A guard would check on them every 20 minutes and bring their meals and snacks to their cell.
They would have family visits in a suite built for that purpose.
They would have access to a library, weight room, spiritual counselling, pool and education.
Simple clothing, shoes, slippers, PJ's and legal aid would be free, on request.
Private, secure rooms for all, with an exercise outdoor yard, with gardens.
Each senior could have a PC a TV radio and daily phone calls.
There would be a board of directors to hear complaints, and the guards would have a code of conduct that would be strictly adhered to.
The criminals would get cold food, be left all alone and unsupervised. Lights off at 8pm, and showers once a week. Live in a tiny room and pay £600.00 per week and have no hope of ever getting out.
Think about this (more points of contention):
COWS
Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Appleby almost three years ago, right to the stall where she slept in the county of Cumbria?
And, they even tracked her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 125,000 illegal immigrants wandering around our country. Maybe we should give each of them a cow.
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Also;
Think about this ... If you don't want to forward this for fear of offending someone -- YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM! It is time for us grumpy old folk of Britain to speak up!
(, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 20:51, Reply)
As far as I can tellYour friends are pricks.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 21:07,
Reply)
This probably means you're a prick.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 21:08,
Reply)
I do hope you reported this as hate speech.(
The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 21:35,
Reply)
I report all of dozer's posts to the modsBut still they do nothing.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 21:39,
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Anyone else listening to Stuart Maconie's Freakzone?If not, why not?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 21:15,
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He plays some great music.So shut up, prick.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 21:17,
Reply)
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1911335
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 21:20,
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b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1911323
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 21:24,
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b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1911338
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 21:18,
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Oh come onHe's playing Bruce Haack right now, Roland Kirk earlier.
This is great.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 21:21,
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You only like obscure stuff so you can feel superior to other people.You don't actually like it really, it's all for show.
You disgust me.
(, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 21:23, Reply)
I don't even like Bruce Haack or Roland Kirk anymore now that you've heard their namesThey've become too mainstream.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 21:26,
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oh wait I just got it hahaha(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 21:43,
Reply)
Good thanks.Just order a couple of scarves.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 22:00,
Reply)
The fuck am I.I'm a right bargain hunter.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Mar 2013, 22:02,
Reply)
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