At last I have a voice!
Afternoon, all. Been lurking in here for some time now, so I decided to sign up. It's been a long week, waiting until I could finally post and be heard!

I decided to unlurk here as this seems to be the most welcoming of the boards. I'll do my best to be entertaining, at least!

*pop*
(Shimrod, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 15:38, 28 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

You're rubbish!
Fuck off.

Sorry... Welcome to OT, leave your social life in the bin by the door.
( Cawl, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 15:39, Reply)

Newbie alert!
Quick grab them while you can.

Stay away from /talk - they have cooties.
( girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 15:41, Reply)

Haha
Welcome!

Don't lurk here too long.. there are plenty of things to do, across all the boards!
( Thinker, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 15:42, Reply)

I saw him first
He's mine.
( Cawl, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 15:42, Reply)

@Kaol
How do you know it's a he?
( girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 15:43, Reply)

Hello Shimrod
Don't worry about Kaol. He's harmless.

Except for the knives.

So, usual stuff. Tell us about yourself. And Kaol will have some questions for you, no doubt.

*cue Kaol*
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 15:44, Reply)

Questions?
1) Are you male or female?

2) Have you ever done anything that would lead to more than 3 years in prison if you were caught?

3) What is your favorite colour? Why?

4) If you had a giant laser, mounted on a satellite, with enough power to vaporise one person on earth, who would it be, and why?

5) What would you do if confronted by a flesh-eating horse?
( Cawl, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 15:47, Reply)

Fuck off back to where you came from, you cunt.
I mean, hello!
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 15:47, Reply)

The Entightened Diabolo Welcomes You.
Enjoy your time here. You will do well to bring cake.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 15:47, Reply)

@Kaol
1. Male.

2. Yes. I may tell those stories one day.

3. Green, as it's the colour of life.

4. GW Bush, as he seems to have been the one to stir up the global shitstorm now plaguing us all.

5. Put you between it and me.
(Shimrod, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 15:50, Reply)

As for the rest of you
thank you for the warm welcome. I feel at home already.

(Good thing I have a fairly tough hide...)
(Shimrod, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 15:52, Reply)

Excellent stuff
Answer 5) was a nice touch.
*grins*
( Cawl, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 15:58, Reply)

Thank you.
I do have a rather strong instinct for self-preservation. *grin*

I have to say, though, the current QOTW is more than a bit disappointing. I'm hoping that the next one will be a little easier for me to answer. Unfortunately I'm not a big movie watcher.

Personally I'm not a big fan of cake, either- no idea why, I'm just not. I prefer pie, preferably cherry. Should I have some handy, I'll be happy to share it.
(Shimrod, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 16:18, Reply)

Hi Shimrod
Any apple and blackberry pie? with cream of course.


Welcome.
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 16:23, Reply)

Hello new person!
Pull up a kitten and answer the following:

Cake or pie?

Sushi or badgers?

Curry or metaphysics?

If you could be any person on earth for 3.2 seconds only, who would it be?
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 16:27, Reply)

Apple is good
as long as it's made with tart apples.

Cherry pie likewise has to be tart.

Banana cream is also good, as is pumpkin.

But more than pie, I'm a great fan of Belgian chocolate.
(Shimrod, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 16:28, Reply)

@ Empress
1. Pie, definitely. Cake is too sweet for my tastes.

2. Sushi- although it can be somewhat more dangerous than a badger if it's gone off.

3. Metaphysics, I'd say. I love to debate odd concepts.

4. For only 3.2 seconds? I'd want to be someone in the midst of the most intense orgasm of their life. I'd get the payoff without having to go through the buildup. And the poor bastard whose body I borrowed would come back mighty confused at being spent without remembering how he got that way!
(Shimrod, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 16:37, Reply)

Shimrod
Verily, you have passed the test. Welcome.

Now take off all your clothes and do a little dance.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 16:40, Reply)

that's ok
I like to see you dance as well.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 16:45, Reply)

Heh. Glad I didn't have to pass that test.
Welcome to the asylum.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 22 Jul 2008, 16:46, Reply)

But the most important question of all is
cake or death?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 16:58, Reply)

Oh, Death please.
No, cake! Cake, I meant Cake!
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 17:04, Reply)

This is in bad taste
so it will fit in quite well here.

When Bob asked the question about who you'd like to be for 3.2 seconds, my first thought was "the bloke flying the plane on Sept 11th, 3.21 seconds before the impact".

It scares me that I thought of that so quickly.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 17:09, Reply)

K626
I actually thought I'd like to be someone falling from a great height with no parachute. Simply so I would know what it would be like to be facing certain (and imminent) death.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 17:12, Reply)

Very boring but true.
I would like to spend 3.2 seconds as my sister because I would like to know what the fuck goes on in her head. 3.2 seconds should be just enough time.

She's a silly cow!
( girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jul 2008, 19:14, Reply)

^^ 3.2 seconds
might be too long- or years might not be enough. Some people can simply never be understood.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 22 Jul 2008, 19:20, Reply)