I'm cooking lime, honey & chili chicken. One of my favourites.
Alt: we have agreed that Micro will spend this Christmas with me, then alternate years. I am absolutely astounded that my ex has agreed to this.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:26, 3 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

excellent work on both parts

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:27, Reply)

Christmas Eve & Christmas Day until 6.30pm. Then she'll go to Edinburgh until New Year.
Not only is this a massive result, she suggested it.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:29, Reply)

That seems reasonable
Next year you can have Boxing Day with her and call it 2nd Christmas
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:33, Reply)

Innit.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:37, Reply)

Nice one.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:44, Reply)

Alt: good news mate!

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:29, Reply)

Ta. I just hope she doesn't change her mind.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:29, Reply)

She's two.
I bet she changes her mind every five minutes.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:33, Reply)

But I want a horse!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:34, Reply)

Ho ho.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:37, Reply)

Jesus, I hope your Santa impression improves before xmas.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:39, Reply)

well he only comes once a year now

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:43, Reply)

That would be an improvement.
If I don't break my drought soon Geldof will be arranging another benefit concert.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:44, Reply)

"Give us your fucking!"

"I'm sorry, Sir Bob. Don't you mean 'give us your fucking MONEY'?"
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:47, Reply)

I think its the flies that put them off

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 21:05, Reply)

I shall keep stuff crossed for you, you bitter old cunt.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:33, Reply)

Ta.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:36, Reply)

Had to put that in for fear of being 'nice'. Sorry.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:38, Reply)

That's a bit good.
Plus, as the child of a broken home, micro will get two christmases each year, and her parents will try to outdo each other with the extravagance of their gifts.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:33, Reply)

I don't spoil her, that would be shit parenting.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:36, Reply)

Wait until little Paris gets an ipad aged 4
Then say that
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:38, Reply)

Micro can already use mine, well enough to unlock it, fire up Netflix Kids, select what she wants to watch and get it playing.
She's nearly 26 months.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not bigging her up - it seems all her peers can do the same.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:43, Reply)

That's more than mr b3th can do.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:47, Reply)

My two kidnap my phone and tablet all the time

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:58, Reply)

As much as I hate to admit it, I know you wouldn't be that small and petty.
But you can bet your arse her grandfather will.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:38, Reply)

To be fair to the prick, he knows that if he acts inappropriately with things like that he'll be in the shit if I ever need to get the courts involved re contact.
Apparently they strongly resent overly-indulgent grandparents.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Oct 2013, 20:41, Reply)