only once, when i was the new kid, and i was about 6
it was the most buckinghamshire middle-class bullying since quinoa shoved couscous off its perch. and i had a proper honda accord moment too.

bully: nobody can look at my work until it's done
girl 1: nobody can look at my work until it's done
girl 2: nobody can look at my work until it's done
girl 3: nobody can look at my work until it's done
bully: but we can all look at swipe's

swipe: (mildly) well, if you need the help...

we were friends soon afterwards. i still remember with bitter jealousy that she had a toy sweetshop, and her mum let her put REAL hundreds and thousands in the jars. after months of pestering, i got.... a toy grocery shop and my mother's offer of REAL peas was scornfully declined.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 13:42, 1 reply, 11 years ago)

How is that bullying?

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 13:45, Reply)

Yeah I mean everyone has seen swipes

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 13:46, Reply)

they were all working as pre-teen sex slaves

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 13:46, Reply)

are you trying to get dozer and baggycock to have a wanking race?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 13:50, Reply)

I won.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 13:54, Reply)

well I'd rather they wanked about your distant spoddy schooldays than groomed actual kids

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 13:55, Reply)

steady on science club

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 13:57, Reply)

they cut me out, man
i wasn't allowed to talk to them or look at their books or their "beautiful sunday" pencil cases (when i was 6, those things were make or break in the coolness stakes).

it lasted for a whole week.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 13:51, Reply)

I hope you went looking for other friends who weren't cunts.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 13:54, Reply)

it was a little village school, there wasn't much choice, sadly
but it did leave me with a massive distaste for bullying. i was lucky, i was very popular at school (as now, natch), but i saw the kids who weren't, and i reckon there's a lifetime of issues there as a result.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 13:55, Reply)

like not being able to put spoons in your mouth

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 13:58, Reply)

you stick to your shovelling muck
and i'll stick to my civilised eating

and provided we never have to do it in the same room at the same time, everyone will be happy
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 14:00, Reply)

room county
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 14:00, Reply)

+r

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 14:04, Reply)

granorexics are never happy when they're eating

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 14:03, Reply)

way to steal monty's joke

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 18 Nov 2014, 14:21, Reply)