I had a nice leisurely journey in
and two weetabix for breakfast, thanks.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 8:47, 2 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

I played with the budgie
And am now sitting in a cab that doesn't smell. Score.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 8:51, Reply)

I have a reserved seat on the DLR.
You get a better class of commuter on the DLR.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 8:53, Reply)

[joke about everybody on English commuter transport being reserved]

(old man river possible lesbian, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 8:55, Reply)

commuter driver
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 8:58, Reply)

The reliability is better than all other lines I think.
And it has no drivers.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 8:59, Reply)

I think that was the joke, love

(old man river possible lesbian, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:01, Reply)

I thought she liked to sit at the front and pretend to drive.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:05, Reply)

Everybody does that.
If you don't get the driver's seat then you lose at DLR
(old man river possible lesbian, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:07, Reply)

Tried that once. Didn't understand the attraction.
Weren't a wheel nor any pedals, neither.
( Kroney, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:17, Reply)

I may be wrong, but I don't think most trains have a steering wheel

(old man river possible lesbian, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:26, Reply)

My ex-wife thought they did
She's a teacher
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:27, Reply)

No that's on the bus
I love me a nice (empty) double decker
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:10, Reply)

there's deffo at least three euphemisms in here

(old man river possible lesbian, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:14, Reply)

The new ones are v cool
Berk says they look like pirates with an eye patch.

No euphemism.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:16, Reply)

I'm hungover in a tube being forced to listen to two pensioners
banging on and on in their outdoor voices about their grandchildrens commuting and coffee drinking habits.
( Kroney, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 8:52, Reply)

You're legally allowed to kill old people like that you know

( Peej, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 8:53, Reply)

I long for a return to a personal automobile commute

( Kroney, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 8:54, Reply)

fuck no
car commuting is almost as degrading as spending a hour breathing tube farts
(old man river possible lesbian, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 8:59, Reply)

I far prefer it.
My happiest commute was the drive between Guildford and Dorking. Oh, those halcyon days... No motorways, no tubes, bliss.
( Kroney, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:01, Reply)

yeah ... but 90% of that bliss was presumably because you weren't in Guildford

(old man river possible lesbian, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:04, Reply)

I grew up in Guildford. Planning on moving back again soon!

( Kroney, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:10, Reply)

really? jesus

(old man river possible lesbian, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:13, Reply)

Lots of lovely little villages in the triangle between The Ford, the Ming and the King (a little native parlance for you, there)
I'm not precious about my home town, curious as to why you seem to dislike it, though. It's no Woking.
( Kroney, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:15, Reply)

that entire area fills me with horror and contempt for mankind
it epitomises everything that's wrong with the country and its ambitions
the whole place seems organised around making it convenient to work and inoffensive to rest ... it's like a Thatcherite Brave New World meets the Stepford Wives.
(old man river possible lesbian, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:18, Reply)

Oh I see, you've your Scargill-filtered specs on.
There isn't much I'm saying to change that, I guess.
( Kroney, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:20, Reply)

eh?
I'm basically a one-nation Tory with a heavy dose of libertarian. What does Scargill have to do with the soulless rat race dreariness of the M4 corridor?
(old man river possible lesbian, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:24, Reply)

Historical bias, I'm afraid.
All our liberals are commies. Made an assumption.
( Kroney, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:28, Reply)

you could be in there
tell them you've got Mellow Birds and custard creams and you could be topped and tailed by sweet granny pussy by lunch time
(old man river possible lesbian, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 8:54, Reply)

start tutting loudly.
and occasionally muttering "for fucks sake"
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 8:54, Reply)

Like any real man I scowled and complained impotently online

( Kroney, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:00, Reply)

My coffee has 'skin' on top today :(

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 8:55, Reply)

Oh god.

( Kroney, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 8:56, Reply)

I know.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 8:58, Reply)

boak

(old man river possible lesbian, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 8:57, Reply)