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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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They should dress you up in a bunny suit
tell you you're the "Happiness Bunny" and order you to spread happiness around the conference. Anyone who doesn't smile has to take over the bunny suit and continue the job.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 7 May 2015, 9:55, 2 replies, latest was 10 years ago)
This will probably be terrifyingly near the mark

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 7 May 2015, 9:56, Reply)
It's out of a Dilbert book I read ages ago, and allegedly it's a true story

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 7 May 2015, 9:57, Reply)
Sounds a bit Donnie Darko to me.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti., Thu 7 May 2015, 10:20, Reply)

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