Ladies and Gentlemen, it's the Tuesday night thread

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 19:38, 63 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

anyone around...?
Hello....?
(The Stig, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 19:43, Reply)

Ning!
I tried to do a thread this evening, but my drop-shadow wouldn't go to transparency properly... I blame the two pints after work.

There wasn't a HSH thread last night *gasp*
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 19:45, Reply)

howdy, No3L!
you read my qotw post yet?

I'm in a pimping mood, tonight.
(The Stig, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 19:46, Reply)

Greetings Stig and No3L
I think last night's thread was cancelled due to the snow.

EDIT: * Pictures Stig wearing a Pimp coat, matching hat and plenty of bling *
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 19:46, Reply)

Could you make it become 5 here so I can go home, please?
kthxbai
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 19:49, Reply)

Spakman
I'm not that kind of pimp.

I'm more one of those nasty, Serbian ones! The ones who'd quite happily slit your throat as soon as look at you.
(The Stig, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 19:52, Reply)

It's Big Daddy Stig and his posse of postitutes

Evening Kristine

* Tries to shove the big hand of time *

* fails *
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 19:52, Reply)

hellos
today we got snow here. skived from job. nice day.
( cackers, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 19:53, Reply)

Gretings cackers
I stayed at home yesterday, but cycled into work today. Weather is just slightly snowy here. Don't know about NY, but in London, it takes just a tiny bit of snow and temperature slightly below 0 to stop the entire fleet of busses in London.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 19:56, Reply)

cackers
I've been working from home for the past 2 days. I have to make an appearance at the office tommorrow!

Dang!

@Spakman

I think you're being harsh there. The snowfall was pretty harsh. Snowfall was about 14 inches around my way.
(The Stig, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 19:57, Reply)

I unfortunately failed to skive at all
but I did get a wonderful walk in the snow yesterday.

More to come Thursday or Friday apparently.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 19:58, Reply)

mistaspakkaman
thanks for trying
*wishes for the day to go by faster*
*smokes through ears*
*panics*
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 19:58, Reply)

No3l
how's the job hunting going?
(The Stig, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:00, Reply)

* sticks fingers in Kristine's ears *
Hopefully, that will affect your percieved passage of time (or at least give you something to think about).
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:01, Reply)

mistaspakkaman
your fingers aren't wet are they?
I may have to kill you.
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:08, Reply)

* hastily removes them from Kristine's ear *
Um... nope. They're not wet at all...
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:11, Reply)

oh :(
*squeegees ears*
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:20, Reply)

sorry to collide on you all
but can I just say that my lawyer just rang...

papers signed. cackers is free at last!!!


:)
( cackers, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:27, Reply)

And now for something completely different...

Greenlandic Hip-Hop

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:28, Reply)

Also this made me chuckle
Fox and Geese.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:30, Reply)

re: skiving
had specific reasons for avoiding the office. not usually what I do, pretty much always show up even if on death's door.

we here in NYC usually manage with the shitty weather. but it gave me an excuse to dodge a 3rd day. shit is all Machiavelli in workplace... argh.

might actually break my sledge in later tonight. zoom!
( cackers, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:30, Reply)

@ spaak
genius. made me laugh. might even flash you if you're lucky!
( cackers, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:33, Reply)

Greetings Tlic
@cackers: What papers? WHat are you free from?
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:33, Reply)

geese
I used to live along the 'North American Flyway' where all of the birds migrate south. Honk, Honk, Honk, all the time.

*my brother is gaming my landlord downstairs. I wonder if she is the cougar of his dreams*

yeah, we're all pervy in my clan.
( cackers, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:35, Reply)

Papers?
I take it this means that you're free of the bonds of matrimony? In which case, thou art sent to the nearest watering hole of your choice to get blasted!

Congrats!
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:37, Reply)

* prepares cheap necklace to throw at cackers just in case *

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:38, Reply)

Good evening
I had the shits yesterday. Which was nice.

/Lowers tone
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:39, Reply)

Evenin' Davvy Gee
'tis only nice when it's coming out. Otherwise, it's shit.

* once had a 7 week bout of the shits myself *
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:42, Reply)

cackers you're weird
but in a weird way.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:44, Reply)

Few things in life
are as overrated as bad sex or as underrated as a good shit.

100% FACT.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:45, Reply)

Loony
I, personally, like a nice glass of Courvoisier.

Good trips to the toilet....I can take or leave them.

As for bad sex, well...when I get SOME sex, I'll make a judgement then.
(The Stig, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:47, Reply)

*weird*
Yes, am weird. Has always been. I hope to have the time over the next couple of days to regale you all with school days. attended no less than 40 such youth prisons along the way. part of why I'm so bargy. Am a friendly beast though. Just a bit too intense for most.

Papers: yes, end of matrimony. Free at last!

*unhooks brassiere, and smiles*
( cackers, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:54, Reply)

Well
If I was a Samaritan and someone came on the phone, full of desparation and wanting to die, I'd advise them to go and have a good shit.

Things always seem better after a good shit...

Copyright Viz Letterbocks
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:55, Reply)

Oh, and speaking of papers
I need my decree absolute to get married. I've lost the fucker.

Fortunately I have found the nisi, which has the case number on it, so a replacement copy will cost a fiver as opposed to forty quid!

I did think about asking my ex wife if she would lend me hers but that probably would have gone down like a fart in a spacesuit.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Feb 2009, 20:58, Reply)

Looks like I'm in for another round of Cat Drop tonight
The cat has taken to lying along the top-front of the monitor and dozing off. After an indeterminate amount of time, she rolls over...

The trick is to spot the warning signs of an imminent roll and get my arms up so that instead of crashing onto the keyboard she rolls down my arms and ends up lying on her back in the crook of my elbows.

When it works she just looks up at me as if to say, "What just happened?"

When it doesn't there's either the aforementioned keyboard crashing, or worse arms partway outstretched get shredded on the way past.

Last night's score was 2-1, 2 catches to 1 shredding. Cat is dozing off...
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 21:03, Reply)

best of luck
LOL about your ex and flatulent scubagear.

Keep the faith. It is possible. Know many success stories. Sometimes things just aren't in the cards. (me.) Not bitter.
( cackers, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 21:04, Reply)

Yay for friendly intense weirdoes!!!
And another yay for freedom!

* throws necklace towards cackers *
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 21:07, Reply)

I will expect at least a tenner
to tuck into the top of my tights.

thank you.
( cackers, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 21:12, Reply)

@Tlic
Is the monitor one of those newfangled flatscreen ones? If not, you should get one of them. Less space for a cat to lie on.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 21:12, Reply)

@cackers
For a tenner, I'd expect at least a fondle ... on each one.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 21:15, Reply)

Cackers
You got a price list? :O)
(The Stig, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 21:19, Reply)

maybe
but ten would just be a security deposit

sorry to be so spendy...supply vs. demand

goods are *worth more*
( cackers, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 21:21, Reply)

@spakka
No, big old 24" CRT "borrowed" from a previous work.

EDIT: I really need to get a webcam, cos this would totally go viral.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 21:22, Reply)

@cackers
How about I pay with the gentle caress of my hand and it's five fingers of encirclement?
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 21:33, Reply)

depends
on size of fingers. and strength. report back with specs.
( cackers, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 21:36, Reply)

please
do not let my wanton ways kill this thread!

carry on, all, thanks.
( cackers, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 21:45, Reply)

Be as wanton as you like
My hands that can grasp an ostritch-egg and crush it will no doubt satisfy your wantonness.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 21:54, Reply)

Because crushing large fragile things
is so much more manly than crushing small fragile things, like grapes.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 22:05, Reply)

The Light in Chains has killed the thread!
*points and laughs*

*passes hat*

*pokes tongue out and runs away*
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Feb 2009, 22:36, Reply)

Oh
Wipes sleep off eyes

Grunts

Turns over

Dozes off again....
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 22:43, Reply)

*Prods the Disappointed*
*wonders where everyone has gone*

*slopes off*
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Feb 2009, 22:52, Reply)

Uhh...uhh...shite
I was having a dream and some silly ol' bugger woke me up.

Leave me alone, chief.

I'm dreaming of Patsy Kensit and that rich bird off Emmerdale finding me butt naked in the snow and reviving me in the best way they know how.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 22:57, Reply)

* returns *
My fingers are aching. Anyone got something to soothe them?
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 23:01, Reply)

OK so
Do give 'em one from me, won't you?

/knows who Patsy is but not the other one. I hope she's not a boiler
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Feb 2009, 23:02, Reply)

Is ashamed
Somebody posted Zahada as one of those "work out the URL for the next level" type quizzes and I have been busy using google to cheat at that.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 23:03, Reply)

Uh oh
you're all stuck on level 1, aren't you?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 23:09, Reply)

Got her jugs out a lot in Dennis Potter stuff
Now in Emmerdale.

A fine fantasy for a lonely Tuesday night.

Amanda somebody....
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 23:10, Reply)

go on and grab a feel
was called away for an emergency. but bosoms are out now.
( cackers, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 1:32, Reply)

*realiizing*
this thread was for 'ladies'

oops.
( cackers, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 1:57, Reply)

What?
Well... Sod that.
It's 2am, and I've just finished a bunch of work I had to do.

Time for a celebratory smoke, out in the snow.
( Cawl, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 2:01, Reply)

tobacco
enjoy. I light up a Dunhill now. and look forward to Old Holburn in a few weeks. *puff*
( cackers, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 2:07, Reply)

Lucky Strike for me.
Had to finish off a packet of Marlboro Reds earlier. Tasted like oats.
( Cawl, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 2:10, Reply)

marlboro man
what happened to the reds? was my first brand. tastes like shite now, don't it?

new Dunhill fired up now. ahhh. but misses my roll-ups.

yeah, cackers is ckufing weerd.
( cackers, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 3:11, Reply)