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( , Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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I discount myself from this since I'm deeply involved with a fellow B3tan.
But who do you think would make a good B3ta couple?
My money's on al and Bert. Bert could get into a menage a trois with Kaol following a drunken night of stupidity at some PR bash, after which Kaol would microwave al's pet bunny before trying to do the stabby stabby thing to Bert when Bert tried to drown him in the bath. Then, al would come in and blow Kaol away with a peashooter in the brain and live happily ever after with Bert and make lots of little almonkeys.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 0:48, 47 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
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would make an excellent couple.
EDIT: I just realised you have Fatal Attraction on your mind.
Excellent movie that.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 1:42, Reply)
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anyone remember the Koit/Workboresme fund.
I never did get anything out of that! :D At all!
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 6:38, Reply)
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but I'd like to see CHCB and grandmasterfluffles spraying water on each other's boobies too.
Happylittletulip and TheGrammarBadger are quite well suited, as I think they'd both be a bit bouncy.
Vampyrecat and Holy Gabrielle.
I want some lesbian sex, B3ta. Ya hear me?
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:07, Reply)
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And I agree with your choices.
Good work, son, I'm proud of you.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:12, Reply)
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and give me a penny sweet, you bastard.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:17, Reply)
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Not since the court order your mother put on me.
See, if you'd have kept it a secret, you would have got a Worther's Original by now.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:19, Reply)
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as long as I don't tell your monitoring officers, we can do anything you like.
Give me the smooth, buttery sweet!
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:21, Reply)
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Atta boy...
Wait a minute, I was thinking about b3tan lesbian sexiness before, now it's all gone horribly wrong!
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:24, Reply)
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Besides, this is what lesbians do behind closed doors anyway. Now, which one of us is going to pretend to be the man?
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:37, Reply)
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can't see any problem with those choices.
But really though DG, b3ta couples? It'll all end in tears (apart from you and the sweary one that is).
EDIT: and PJM and chickenlady
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:58, Reply)
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That Ms Crow is a B3tan. Only been a member for 3 or 4 months, so you might not have twigged yet, but a B3tan nevertheless.
See if you can guess who she is.
First person to get it right: I'll...um...jizz on your tits*.
*Substitute "Manboobs" where appropriate
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:46, Reply)
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was a bloke...?
Edit: So, no, in other words
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:56, Reply)
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is a bloke, I was implying that you were gay, you big wingnut.
Er... Agnostic Antichrist and running home to cry like a baby in his mother's arms after somebody on the internet called him a pig-faced Emo boy with a minute penis and hands like a clammy Norman Tebbit.
Arroooooooo....
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:03, Reply)
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The beard is pretty conclusive
Edit: I retract the above insult for the brilliance of the "clammy Norman Tebbit" metaphor.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:05, Reply)
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It can't be Dave The Hat, he's been here for years...
Give us a clue.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:16, Reply)
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But her name is a reference to Milton Keynes
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:19, Reply)
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Pig faced? Fair enough
Minute Penis? Not certain how you know, but fair enough.
Emo?!?!?! That's just cruel man!
I know you're still in withdrawal from Thatcher no longer being in No. 10, but there's no need to take it that far?
Just go give her a pearl necklace again, she'll appreciate it.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:31, Reply)
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I don't want to have to set my apathetic goths on you.
I'm not a Thatcherite, I'm a Thacist.
Bring back RoboThatcher!
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:33, Reply)
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Gabby's not ghey like me.
She's lovely - but she's not ghey.
And she's on the other side of an ocean. :(
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:37, Reply)
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and though I'm not much into women, it's nice to be on your list, Sexmonkey.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:41, Reply)
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CHCB You will always be on my list. You were my first b3ta-crush, and I'd throw you down in a minute if it weren't for the third parties involved.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:44, Reply)
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That's probably the sweetest thing I've heard Bert say. To a female, at least.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:46, Reply)
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Singular. I am man-free for the next 6 weeks. Also, my mate has bet me £20 I can't last til Easter. He said £200 if I also gave up porn and masturbation but that's just ridiculous.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:46, Reply)
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lie on the porn and masturbation front.
200 pounds is 200 pounds.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:47, Reply)
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I was in love with CHCB, I longed for her, I was forlorn and lost without out her, but she cast me aside to persue a more disastrous, complicated cumsquelch of a man.
EDIT *throws Mrs Monkeysex on the fire*
Right, where would you like to meet up for some non-contact sexual gratification?
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:48, Reply)
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I vaguely remember that from my days as a lurker.
I couldn't give up masturbation for 6 weeks. Two is the most I've managed.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:49, Reply)
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nine days twenty-three hours and fifty minutes.
I came buckets that night, it was awful.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:51, Reply)
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Now Bert, I really don't think that's a fair description of Enzyme. You know as well as I do that "man" is an unsubstantiated claim. He has long hair, after all.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:54, Reply)
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nasty.
the long hair is a dead giveaway, I always said that I would do him, but I don't think I fancy your sloppy seconds.
Unless I'm sucking them out of your oozing fanny.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:55, Reply)
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Not for 40 days and 40 nights. And Sundays.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:56, Reply)
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singing Club Tropicana and rubbing butterscotch angel delight into my tits, you won't be able to resist.
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:01, Reply)
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so I can come round and sort you out, in a religious fashion.
Or I could look it all up on the internet, stalk you, hunt you down and jump you on your way to your car, if it makes you feel more popular?
( , Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:08, Reply)
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