What the hell do I do with...
a big strapping 17 year old lad?? I have now found myself in the position of looking after said boy...I say boy, he is 6'3" and built like the proverbial outhouse! Much amusement to be had as he tries to negotiate the very low doors in my little cottage! He is my brother's eldest son, who was living with his mother until recently, when she decided she hated him, and threw him out...Nice
My brother has no room for him in his place, otherwise of course he would have stepped in. So...What do I do with a 17 year old?? I have no clue how to keep him occupied, other than buy him a bus pass and send him off into Cambridge.

Help?
( bentalls In my head, I am a ninja, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:26, 29 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Give him a computer with an Internet connection and a lock on his door.
Its all I needed at 17 and we had a 28k modem back then.
( Peej, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:27, Reply)

Xbox and a 1/8 of weed
Sorted.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:28, Reply)

Rape him
and cast him out. Otherwise he might start to feel wanted.

EDIT Ah, crap. Here I am, jumping the gun at a female b3tan again.
Allow him to rape you, but make sure that he feels it.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:30, Reply)

Erm!
I have a day or two spare. I'm sure I can come up with something.
( girlinthehole, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:34, Reply)

Eeew
Bert, he is my NEPHEW!! I changed his nappies once... *sicks in mouth a little*
He has access to a computer, and he brought his xbox (priorities...no clothes, but managed the xbox!!)
The lock on the door will have to wait for now, as he is on the sofa till I can acquire a bed!
BGB...he is indeed a big strapping lad, but I fear for his safety!! A woman of the world such as your good self would probably be too much for him...Or maybe just what he needs. Fuck it, come on over!
( bentalls In my head, I am a ninja, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:34, Reply)

BGB
If he had a go at your rabbit hole we'd never see him again.

I'm not sending ferrets in there after him, not after last time.

EDIT bentalls, that's what nephews and nieces are for, just ask my uncle jim.
I hate you uncle jim!

*cries*
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:35, Reply)

Is this a long term thing, or just for a couple of weeks?
If it's long term, I'd go with other suggestions (except the rape). Stuff like a computer and internet will be enough he needs in the house, perhaps his own telly in his room and a DVD so he can keep himself amused. Kids at that age don't want to be taken on excursions usually because, sorry to say, you're an adult and therefore "uncool" :D . Take him out for his tea to a nice pub every now and again. I remember when I was 17 I just wanted tonnes and tonnes of privacy and to be able to mope around in peace.

Nice thing you're doing, well done you.
x
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:36, Reply)

Not sure how long it's for
but as long as he needs, I guess... Last night I just gave him beer and left him with a pc and some dvds!
( bentalls In my head, I am a ninja, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:37, Reply)

Having seen your profile pic
and knowing 17 year old boys, he already has a crush on you.

I say go for it, don't let society's morals stand in your way. Or your husband.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:38, Reply)

missed the bit in the profile that says lesbian did we Bert?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:41, Reply)

Says 'body of a lesbian'
not rug muncher.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:42, Reply)

is he any good at golf?
i need a caddie and live near cambridge :)
(Halfy By light alone, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:42, Reply)

@Mrs Bert
You know damn well I'm tighter than a.....a......erm........very very tight thing.
( girlinthehole, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:42, Reply)

To a 17 year old
lesbian is probably quite interesting...But probably less so when it's your auntie! (God, I hope so, anyways)

*edit* Halfy, I have no idea, but I'm sure he can heft a bag with the best of them!
( bentalls In my head, I am a ninja, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:42, Reply)

I don't know first hand.


'Body of a lesbian' could just mean 'broad shoulders, slim hips and hairy shoulders'.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:43, Reply)

@bentalls
Sounds like last night's plan of beer and DVDs was a winner! Woo!
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:45, Reply)

@Bentalls
How dare you!

I was just thinking of some painting that needed doing : )
( girlinthehole, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:47, Reply)

BGB
Ah, but of course!! How very rude of me...;o)
( bentalls In my head, I am a ninja, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:50, Reply)

don't apologise yet
she meant painting her vaginal walls with steaming hot semen.

That BGB is absolute filth.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:52, Reply)

Painting
Need your inner walls whitewashed then BGB?

Edit: Beaten by Bert...
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:55, Reply)

*snort*
Thanks, Bert, coffee on the keyboard is not easy to clean up!!

Thanks for the suggestions, guys, keep 'em coming! I'm off to take him into town now, but thank you
( bentalls In my head, I am a ninja, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:56, Reply)

Pffft!
You all seem to have the wrong idea about me.
( girlinthehole, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 12:58, Reply)

Buy him beer
but make him work for it.

Make him do simple chores.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 13:30, Reply)

Hmmmn
Rent him out to desperate friends. Everyone wins.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 14:26, Reply)

Is he still at school? Or on a gap year?
I think if he got a part-time job, that would keep him entertained for part of the time. And then he'd have money for stuff he wants - not that I'm saying your Brother isn't going to give him pocket money, but earning his own cash will give him a nice sense of independence. Is there a pub/restaurant nearby he can work in?

I spent uni holidays working in a pub near Cambs, and made quite a few good friends there: both co-workers and locals.

And, as others have said, get him to help out with chores. Once he gets that lock on his door, he'll be fwapping away for hours on end and be of no use to anyone...
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 15:40, Reply)

There is a hotel
in the village, he could work in the kitchens there part time! And I'm quite sure I can find some chores for him to do...he is on crutches for the moment as he has done the ligaments in his ankle, but it wont be for long! Then he can earn his keep. I don't think I wish to dwell on the thought of him fwapping himself silly!!
( bentalls In my head, I am a ninja, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 17:09, Reply)

Um,
ask him what he likes to do?
( ..wil, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 19:09, Reply)

personal space, and lend an ear when he's ready to talk
It's good he has electronic distractions. Being rejected by a parent, and having nowhere to go is awful. He might be feeling guilty that he's disrupting your life.

Spoken by one who has been in same situation more times than I'd like to count. And also have just taken in my younger brother, who had fuck-all when his father died.

Give it a bit of time to let him breathe. His mother 'hates' him. How awful is that? Pretty bad, can tell you. It will turn out right. Just by providing a safe spot, you are doing something immensely valuable. No need to fix it all straightaway.

Gaz me if you want more detailed/ practical advice. Have literally gone through a similar situation for past 6 mos. Good luck!
( cackers, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 19:27, Reply)

Thanks, all
The advice is really appreciated, and I thank any of you who offered personal stories, too...Cheers! I'm taking him over to his dad's tomorrow, for a long overdue meeting...Long story short, his mum originally told him his dad was dead, then when it was obvious he wasn't, just refused all access and contact. My bro has not seen his son for 5 years, and definitely not through lack of trying!
Here's hoping for a small but significant happy ending
( bentalls In my head, I am a ninja, Fri 27 Feb 2009, 13:52, Reply)