I probably got this one off Sickipedia in the first place
But never mind.

A woman walks into a pub, pushes past the queue of half-cut men in varying stages of halitosis and then turns to face them. She raises one arm to reveal a thickly haired armpit.

"Who will buy this woman a drink?" She calls out.

Most of the men back away in a mix of confusion and fear. Then, from the far end of the bar, the old man, whose vision is impaired partly by his cataracts and more likely by the large glass of cheap scotch he is nursing, shouts to the barman,

"A pint for the ballerina!"

The barman serves the woman and the customers get busy with their drinks in a desperate bid to bleach from their minds the vision (and odour) of the woman's sweaty, hairy underarm.

After the queue has died down, the barman starts talking to the old man.
"Do you know her, then?" He asks,
"No."
"So how did you know she was a ballerina?"
"Only a ballerina could lift her leg that high."
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 22 May 2009, 11:39, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

Was it you or Vipros (I think)
who taught me my offical New Favourite Joke of All Time?

Q: How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman?
A: None

No offence to Tuggers (of Padraig descent) or Mr Morningstar but I FUCKING LOVE THAT JOKE.

Inoffensive but smug grammar-and-history favourite:

Q: Who started the Pedants' Revolt?
A: Which Tyler
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 22 May 2009, 11:46, Reply)

that'd be me
*bows*
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 22 May 2009, 11:47, Reply)

I like that pedant one
I'll have to pick my audience carefully though. I'm already picturing the blank looks and furrowed brows if I told it here at work.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 22 May 2009, 12:26, Reply)

In a similar vein
How many sexual partners does a priest have?
Nun.

(I might have told that wrong)
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 22 May 2009, 15:57, Reply)