I was working in my lab late one night
When my eyes beheld an eerie sight.
My monster from the slab began to arise.
When suddenly to my surprise.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:17, 29 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

The fucker jerked off
And hit you t'wixt the eyes?
( Cawl, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:19, Reply)

Excellent use of the word t'wixt there.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:19, Reply)

Damn straight.
It's an excellent word.
( Cawl, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:24, Reply)

"Avast, what is this? I'm blind as a bat!"
And then I slipped over, foot stuck in my cat.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:20, Reply)

Nope
I never let my monsters wank, it's bad for their eye sight!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:21, Reply)

He did the mash
He did the monster mash
It was a smash
It was a graveyard smash
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:19, Reply)

It caught on in a flash
The Monster Mash
He did the Monster Mash
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:23, Reply)

Lemminge M.D.
I like the way you think. I've been listening to that album recently.
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:24, Reply)

Tadpoles
Is a great album.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:25, Reply)

It is
I also copied off vinyl a whole load of other Bonzo Dog songs. Pretty much the whole cornology album set really.
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:27, Reply)

He got out his penis and said
"check this out for size"
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:19, Reply)

Then
It cried!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:22, Reply)

Then spunked up my nose
To my delight and surprise
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:22, Reply)

He mauled my dog
flushed my cat down the bog
ripped off my head
danced on my bed
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:21, Reply)

bed cavernous vaginal floor.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:22, Reply)

That
doesn't rhyme
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:23, Reply)

Maybe also then
headpummeled and raw

Sorry.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:29, Reply)

That's fine
I'm already having a shit day. More abuse through the internet isn't really going to make any difference
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:38, Reply)

Awwwwww
I'm sorry badgy wadgy, I didn't mean it. Have a look at your lovely bosoms, that would cheer most anything up.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:41, Reply)

Oh Badger
Don't listen to the nasty people.

What's up?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:41, Reply)

A shit sunny friday before the bank holiday?
I've never heard of such a thing.

Let's cheer you up.

Have you tried whistling a merry little tune? Using your g-string?

No, hang on, that's not cheering you up. Someone help me out here..?
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:41, Reply)

^^
LOL
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:24, Reply)

you realised you'd wasted your life

(PsychoChomp, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:23, Reply)

Oh Hell Yeah
But I wouldn't have it any other way
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:25, Reply)

as you wiped up the blood from the corpse of your wife
This thread is making me feel all poetic.

Herr Dok: That's twice you've got in the way now - Grrrr!!!
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:26, Reply)

I'm quite good
At getting in the way of things really.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:35, Reply)

I'm quite good at
going Grrrrr.

Apparently I have the best grrrr in the North-West
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:36, Reply)

Do you
Sound like a dog when you Grrrrrr?

Or like Tony the Tiger?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:38, Reply)

Have you ever seen Peppa Pig?
It's a bit like her brother, George, when he is playing with his dinosaur.

It's quite a nice grrrr, but very non-threatening.
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Fri 22 May 2009, 14:42, Reply)