I am a very bad man.
I just got back an hour ago, having spent last night with my family in Berwick. Instead of showering my beautiful wife with affection and Pinot Grigio, I am currently dicking around in the garden, drinking beer with our neighbour.

How can I make this up to my darling Tourette's? I've just done so. My entire army of daleks & Dr Who toys, books, DVDs & videos are all up for sale on ebay. It should fetch enough money to buy her a small plot of land on which to make her dream come true: to have a retirement home for all those aged cats & dogs you see in rescue shelters whom nobody wants.

That should do the trick I reckon - she will forgive my tosserness for being so inattentive just now.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 27 Jun 2009, 18:07, 12 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Think of the children.
( girlinthehole, Sat 27 Jun 2009, 18:14, Reply)

pffft
At least he's gone out hunting for wine now. However, it's going to take more than the above to mollify me. I'd like a foot massage too. Then we'll see.....
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sat 27 Jun 2009, 18:27, Reply)

What will happen
When you sober up?
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Sat 27 Jun 2009, 19:02, Reply)

Wowzers, I reckon you should dump her and go out with me instead, or something like that.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Jun 2009, 19:34, Reply)

I would just like to say
That I did NOT post this.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 27 Jun 2009, 19:56, Reply)

coughbullshitcough

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sat 27 Jun 2009, 20:00, Reply)

Feck off becky :)
'tis a downside of having automatic remembering of passwords thingy on pooter.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 27 Jun 2009, 20:05, Reply)

MTFU
You can't say fuck off and put a smiley face. That's plain wrong that is.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sat 27 Jun 2009, 20:11, Reply)

I didn't say fuck.
I said feck, which is far more politerer and therefore merits a smiley face, you mong.

:)
:)
:)
:)
:)
:)
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 27 Jun 2009, 20:17, Reply)

And anyway
I wasn't dicking around, I was offering him some genuine advice on how now that he's got a job he could possibly claim a back to work bonus from the Jobcentre and still get his rent and council tax paid for another month, thanks to my suberb 'remembering things from a job I haven't done for 8 years' skillz.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 27 Jun 2009, 20:21, Reply)

Ooh, how long do you have to be out of work to claim for one of those then?
My apologies, I missed the e and read it as a u. Adds another beer to the slate
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sat 27 Jun 2009, 21:22, Reply)

Not sure.
It was six months, but may have changed in the 8 years since I last worked there.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 27 Jun 2009, 22:54, Reply)