Who is
the creepiest person you know? Whether just plain weird or so pervy they'd make Humbert Humbert say "steady on there", who makes your flesh crawl off its bones, and why?
( Maladicta, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 18:34, 21 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

my boss isn't that creepy but he's close
he often says things like 'you're such a beautiful young woman' or 'I bet you've got all the guys lined up around the building waiting to take you out' and last week he pissed me off, I told him he had a mental problem and he replied 'yep, I'm a nympho'.

I've known him since I was five. I think it's tres creepy that he says this stuff because he used to be like a second dad to me and now he's like my pervy uncle.

***This is in no way implying that I am a beatiful woman or that I have men lining up to date me, as I am not and do not.
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 18:46, Reply)

Why don't you let him sink his middle leg into
your penalty area then?
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 18:49, Reply)

From the sound of it
she'd rather let a flying kick into his penalty area and I don't blame her!
( Maladicta, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 18:52, Reply)

I think I'd rather be raped by spiders

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 18:52, Reply)

I will add this to my personal list
which includes "I'd rather staple my ears to a horse" and "I would rather swallow razor wire, pull one end out of my arse and floss myself to death". (Jeremy Clarkson and Zero Punctuation respectively).
( Maladicta, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 19:04, Reply)

haha I dunno what I was thinking when I wrote that it just popped into my head
think I'll be using yours also :p
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 19:05, Reply)

Share the love :)

( Maladicta, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 19:13, Reply)

I'd rather eat 12 live cockroaches

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 19:21, Reply)

I'd rather be done up the arse
by Bernard Manning.
( Maladicta, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 19:23, Reply)

I'd rather eat out Amy Winehouse

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 19:25, Reply)

I'd rather fellate a crocodile.

( Maladicta, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 19:25, Reply)

oh yuck

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 19:31, Reply)

For what it's worth
the creepiest person I can think of is my dad's mate Creepy Brian. He says "excuse me" at the start of every sentence and has made lewd jokes around me since I was 15 or so. Hard to explain really - he used to make comments about me being around Stalker Boy "is he your boyfriend?" "uh, no" "are you sure?" and endless comments about vibrators. When I went to uni all he told me was "leave the men alone".
( Maladicta, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 18:54, Reply)

I hate to use a double standard, but, when it's someone you know intimately like that you'd think they'd think it's inappropriate,
if I'm in a bar or something I don't mind hearing stuff like that because I know at the end of the night I probably won't see them again but when you've got to face someone constantly and wonder what is going through their minds for them to say things like that to you.....it's just yuck.
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 18:58, Reply)

Similarly to your boss really
his wife - who I also loathe, because she calls me "poppet" and pats me on the head; I'm 23 FFS - he's known me since I was five. Not in any way cool.
( Maladicta, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 19:00, Reply)

id totally do humbert humbert

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 19:06, Reply)

jeremy irons ftw

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 19:10, Reply)

But in the 60s version
he was played by James Mason and now I've watched too much Izzard I can no longer take James Mason seriously!

"Jeezy Chreezy!"
( Maladicta, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 19:22, Reply)

The irony is
it's one of my favourite books - was just the best example of a colossal pervert I could come up with...
( Maladicta, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 19:12, Reply)

Bill.
He's a regular at my local bar (Q Club - it's a pool hall....ooohhh, get the name!).
He's 45, his girlfriend is 73 and when he gets drunk he always tries to molest me.
This usually means that I threaten to punch the fuck out of him, because the guys know they WILL twat him one if he doesn't behave when I tell him to.
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 19:12, Reply)

Oh dear GOD that's nasty.
You should pre-emptively cunt him in the fuck!
( Maladicta, Mon 27 Jul 2009, 19:21, Reply)