Bored and exhausted barmaid!
But I have to stay here and 'earn' my crust in this empty pub. And I've played everything on the jukebox one zillion times. What should I do?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:15, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Build a catapult out of spoons and coffee stirrers.

( Maladicta, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:17, Reply)

Got no stirrers.
Spoons are metal. There's one customer in here and about 8 outside. Maybe I should go outside and shout "FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!"
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:29, Reply)

Bugger. That limits your options a bit.
Make them fight!
( Maladicta, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:31, Reply)

I might just go to sleep over the bar.
Or practice whistling the Blue Peter theme. The old one, not the current one.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:35, Reply)

I've changed my mind!
Rickroll them!
( Maladicta, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:46, Reply)

I just whistled Never Gonna Give You Up as loud as I could.
Four customers. Only one looked up...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:50, Reply)

Perhaps the more you do it,
the more they'll notice :)
( Maladicta, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:59, Reply)

You're very naughty
Would you like to complete my shift for me?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 21:08, Reply)

It sounds like fun.
I'm plotting to rickroll my office, but suspect my boss knows this and this is why he won't teach me how to use the plasma screen software...
( Maladicta, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 21:11, Reply)

Would that involve a password or is it just figuring out how to use the software?
I could probably make a few guesses to help you along your way.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 21:24, Reply)

It's the password for the PC that has the software
as well as how to use it; it's a simple slideshowy thing that can also do videos and gifs. And would probably get me fired :(
( Maladicta, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 21:31, Reply)

If you want to get fired
you should do something much more spectacular than a Rickroll.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 21:39, Reply)

That's the thing, I don't want to get fired.
Then I won't be able to go to Paris for nothing any more!
( Maladicta, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 21:45, Reply)

Unless your misdemeanour is running off to Paris and starting a new life for yourself there.

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 22:14, Reply)

Well, I'll have an accomplice.
I shall go to the Pigalle and seek my fortune!
( Maladicta, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 22:15, Reply)

It will certainly be a methaphorical voyage of self-discovery!

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 22:36, Reply)

.
Tell everyone you've decided to support Man Utd?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:27, Reply)

Yeah!
Get myself glassed! Ta for that...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:30, Reply)

Hmm
Whereabouts in the Pool are you?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:37, Reply)

Just outside town.
More or less Studentville
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:44, Reply)

Sounds like fun!
Haha
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:44, Reply)

Yeah, at this time of year...
The joint is hoppin'
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:55, Reply)

Find those bottles of oddly coloured drinks that hardly anyone orders
pour a shot of each and arrange them in a grid with rainbow pattern going in one direction, and arrange them by faint-ness of colour in the other direction.

And then secretly drink the lot when nobody's looking
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:34, Reply)

That's genius
I might have to drink a crate of Red Bull first.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:36, Reply)

That will help you arrange them faster
plus you should invite someone to help you finish them off...
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 21:26, Reply)

*pfft*
"finish them off"
( Maladicta, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 21:30, Reply)

I would
But there's nobody I who could get here in time. I'll just have to keep accepting this free wine from the gaffer...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 21:48, Reply)

Then you should plan ahead
and invite more people in advance. If I came, I'd arrange the drinks in a 3D lattice of colours sorted by hue, saturation and lightness.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 21:59, Reply)

Phone Glyn Williams
Get a couple of charabancs booked!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 22:41, Reply)