Morning retards
how are you today?

good weekend?

I watched this programme called School of Comedy yesterday. Sketch show done by teenagers. It was actually pretty funny.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 8:41, 81 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

No it wasn't
I didn't watch it, but I can tell that it wasn't remotely funny.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 8:42, Reply)

it was
there was a bit set in a parent's evening (it wasn't all kid situations) and the teacher was slagging off the child to its parents. They asked to speak to the Head. The teacher turned round and shouted to the head for his opinion on said child. The head replies "Fucking retard!"

that was funny.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 8:47, Reply)

*puts fingers in ears*
LALALALALALALALALALALALALALA

WASN'T FUNNY!!!!!


LALALALALALALALALALALALALALAL
(Bazongaloid, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 8:49, Reply)

your loss

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 8:50, Reply)

You're the one who wasted your time watching a terrible show
not me.

I was out with real people winning the pub quiz.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 8:51, Reply)

ok, their loss then
by their, I refer to the people you were with
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 8:53, Reply)

You're jealous becuase you didn't win the pub quiz
If you had, you would have been really smug.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 8:53, Reply)

there aren't any pub quizzes worth attending round here
if it makes you feel better, when I was at uni, the bar on our halls campus started running a quiz. my mates and I won by a significant margin 3 weeks in a row, and then they stopped doing it.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 8:58, Reply)

I watched the latest BBC bonnet and bodice ripper, Emma
last night, mainly because it was filmed down the road and one of the characters walked out of a house I almost ended up living in.*


www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00n8s6x



*Today's tenuous claim to fame.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 8:51, Reply)

was there ripping of bonnets and bodices?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 8:52, Reply)

No, lots of bonnets
but actually no bodices as it's Austen and not Defoe.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 8:56, Reply)

That is extraordinarily tenuous.
does extraordinarily have an a in? Yes according to my dictionary.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 8:53, Reply)

I like
extraordinarily as it sounds very archaic and rather intellectual.

All that pub quiz winning has gone to your head.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 8:57, Reply)

It's been a while since we won
so it's quite nice to be back on top. You get £25 worth of beer vouchers so it's not a bad prize, it pays for your drinks the following week.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 8:59, Reply)

Did they ask you lots of questions about bacon?
Caitlin Moran says it's the next Big Thing in today's Times...I think she's very behind and needs to spend time on b3ta to learn about the Next Big Thing.

EDIT - I'm off now to go and see the quack about my heaving chest which is heaving just a little too much.
Ta ta for now!
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:02, Reply)

Thus ensuring you're too drunk to win again
It's a clever system.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:28, Reply)

Gwan badbwa!
Me seff an blunder an ting, no blud clart art attack wi Neil Buchanan.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:01, Reply)

I wouldn't have replied to this either.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:29, Reply)

I would have replied
if I'd been able to understand it.

It looks like something I'd say when on the bog squeezing out a stubborn shite.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:37, Reply)

That was pretty much it.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:01, Reply)

I think my insides are rebelling
after a weekend of drinking far more than usual and eating a rather splendid beef curry at my neighbours last night.

I was sat on the throne groaning for quite a long time this morning.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:07, Reply)

seemed to be a weekend for drinking and curries
I haven't been drinking much recently and went out for beers followed by a curry the other night. Thoroughly enjoyable. First time I've had a curry after getting pissed for a long time.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:11, Reply)

Curry is amazing after a few beers
I reckon it's a chemical thing.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:30, Reply)

yeah, it certainly hit the spot
was staying with gf's sister and her boyfriend and went to their local boozer and curry house. Both top quality places. the staff in the curry house were awesomely sarcastic.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:39, Reply)

The tragedy is when you go back sober
And find it to be merely adequate.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:23, Reply)

Bugger me, is it Monday already?
What happened to the weekend?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:17, Reply)

Shit weekend generally
but I've got glastonbury tickets so all's well.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:40, Reply)

are glastonbury tickets available already?
fucking hell
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:43, Reply)

Not only available,
sold out.
I'm smugger than you today.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:44, Reply)

shocking
not feeling that smug this morning. Too tired, and my knee hurts.

How's your shoulder btw?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:45, Reply)

Fine, I can almost sleep on it now,
I think when I can comfortably sleep on it I can say "I'm healed"
(PsychoChomp, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:46, Reply)

good stuff

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:46, Reply)

I got a new sofa, two armchairs,
A bed, four cabinets and two DVD shelves.
For free.
And I'm moving house next weekend.
( Cawl, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:44, Reply)

nice work
where did you bury the old owners?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:45, Reply)

Nowhere,
They were in the lock-up at my old work.
Oh, and a chair too.
Best thing is that they're delivering them to me, here in Wales, from Essex, also for free.
( Cawl, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:47, Reply)

nice
free furniture is very helpful. we bought a few things when I lived in my flat, bed, sofa, chest of drawers and wardrobe, but everything else that now fills my 3 bedroom house was given to us.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:50, Reply)

You can have a metal futon frame for free if you like.
Offer open to anyone. Mattress not included as we're keeping that for when we have to accommodate b3tans and the like.

OT goes gumtree. Nice.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:57, Reply)

Also available:
loads of clothes, cardboard boxes, a small faux-pine chest of drawers, and a midget.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:58, Reply)

Hmmm...
I'll take the midget.
You guys still up for Therapy? next week?
( Cawl, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:11, Reply)

I'm going in London

(Bazongaloid, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:14, Reply)

Fair enough,
I wasn't asking you, English Pig-Dog.
( Cawl, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:18, Reply)

what date?
Aha. Friday 16th? Yeah, though I'm in London til 3-ish but, trains permitting, I'll be back in the West Country by teatime.

They're playing the Thekla (the boat that does gigs) in Bristol as well - you're welcome to come here for it too/instead.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:22, Reply)

Actually, I'm in London when they're playing Bristol
so Newport it is.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:24, Reply)

Yeah,
The 16th.
You guys are welcome to crash here. Well, not here. In our new house.
Sorry if it smells of old people.
( Cawl, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:26, Reply)

w00t! new house!
What did you do with the old people? Bleed them to death?

Catface wants to know if you want to come to Bristol this weekend but he's too lazy to pick up his phone (actually, he's too busy doing his CV which goes out this morning OR ELSE).
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:31, Reply)

Hmmm...
That'd be fun, but we're moving house this weekend, so it's not gonna work out I'm afraid.
The week after Therapy?, Mel's on holiday, so if you guys wanted to come over some time for food and booze you're more than welcome.
( Cawl, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:34, Reply)

Awwwwwww
now I know how everyone else used to feel when we organised fun London things on open threads.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:40, Reply)

Go West, young man!

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:41, Reply)

It's awful, isn't it?

( Cawl, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:41, Reply)

It's like having the promise of a bacon sandwich
and then having it snatched away, only instead of bacon, it's an evening of fun with a midget, a really grumpy woman and a man who likes to cut things up.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:45, Reply)

all of whom are clincally mental.

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:45, Reply)

The best of all the mentals.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:48, Reply)

That's possibly the nicest thing I've ever heard.

( Cawl, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:46, Reply)

I miss you :(

(Bazongaloid, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:49, Reply)

I don't blame you.

( Cawl, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:54, Reply)

already got a futon with frame
but thanks.

I also have a load of clothes that I need to get rid of. All good stuff, but now I'm not a big fat bastard a lot of it is way too big...
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:03, Reply)

Car boot.
I'm gonna need a bigger car.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:24, Reply)

I bought a cool headboard thing from Ikea yesterday
almost couldn't get it in the car, which would've been embarrassing.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:27, Reply)

This would never happen if LWB Land Rover Defenders were standard issue.
Fact.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:32, Reply)

probably
I intend to get a VW transporter when my car dies.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:38, Reply)

I drove a total of 400 miles
to pick up my new guitar amp.

By jove it was worth it.
(beanojam isn't really Ricardo Flange, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 9:56, Reply)

what did you get?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:02, Reply)

A sore bum,
/I'm here all week.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:28, Reply)

Oh dear...

( Cawl, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:29, Reply)

That was FUCKING hilarious.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:31, Reply)

it wasn't bad
the side of my mouth had a brief spasm that could have been interpreted as a smile.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:33, Reply)

I'm pretty sure that's the first stages of Parkinsons.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:34, Reply)

See, THAT
Raised a smile.
( Cawl, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:36, Reply)

that would be unfortunate
although, an old friend of my parents has Parkinsons and has a remote controlled chip put in his spine to control it.

essentially, he is a cyborg. I could live with that.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:37, Reply)

He's a kind of terminalator.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:38, Reply)

heh
that was funny
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:42, Reply)

Chompy is on form today.
She must have changed her pill.
( girlinthehole, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:44, Reply)

Blimey
Busy at work for an hour...

Peavey 5150 Mark I. The original and best. Yay!
(beanojam isn't really Ricardo Flange, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 11:08, Reply)

nice
worth the trip then!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 11:51, Reply)

in the end, yes
hopefully this one will get more use than the last one I had, which I only used twice then had to sell due to being über skint...
(beanojam isn't really Ricardo Flange, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 12:09, Reply)

I'm glad I've never had to sell any of my gear
that must be awful
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 12:26, Reply)

Morning all
I'm of school poorly as I have spent from 1.20 on Saturday night to yesterday evening being massively sick.

So I'm now sat on the sofa watching This Morning.
It's This Morning's 21st anniversary and they are interviewing Richard and Judy about the stories they have covered over the years.
This has meant that there was just a shot of Richard, Judy, Philip Scofield and Holly Whatsit looking at a screen showing someone having his bollocks poked by a doctor.
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:47, Reply)

Now this is why I hate having to work : (

( girlinthehole, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:49, Reply)

My god, is that how you get your thrills these days?

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 10:57, Reply)

And I got to watch Jeremy Kyle
where there was the usual DNA test but the twist was that the guy claimed he was asleep when the girl in question did the dirty.

It wasn't his needless to say.
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Mon 5 Oct 2009, 11:06, Reply)