Today is going from bad to worse
Ended up in bed with one of my ex's, who ripped my cock to shreds.

Came home, walking like John Wayne, with blood-soaked boxers, to have all my housemates laugh at me for walking like I'd shat myself.

Came online to talk to a few people, only to have one of my best mates say that she needed to "get out of here" and disappear offline two seconds later.

Have just started bleeding gently again.

How has your Saturday gone from bad to worse?
(Ghost Atreides enjoying incontestable health benefits on, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:08, 30 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Sorry!
Sexual fetishes is on the other page.
( girlinthehole, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:10, Reply)

funny one there GBH.
you're on fire tonight!
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:16, Reply)

Pow! Pow!
*shoots from the hip*
( girlinthehole, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:18, Reply)

Sorry darlin'
My cock is too mangled for you to have a go :P
(Ghost Atreides enjoying incontestable health benefits on, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:26, Reply)

Shit saturday?
We should be friends.
(i should have joined myspace, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:20, Reply)

Why, what happened to you?

(Ghost Atreides enjoying incontestable health benefits on, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:26, Reply)

Post is a lil further down on here
:)
(i should have joined myspace, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:27, Reply)

Just read
That's really shit. :(

*Hugs and kittens?*
(Ghost Atreides enjoying incontestable health benefits on, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:30, Reply)

Thank you kindly :)
Kittens galore! We should name this day Shit Saturday. Unless something good has happened? No?
(i should have joined myspace, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:32, Reply)

What the hell were you up to to rip your cock to shreds?
Or is this a case of vagina dentata?
(Shippy likes linebreaks and doesn't care what you think, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:35, Reply)

I've had some problems in the past before with my cock
www.b3ta.com/questions/blood/post218147 - part 1.

Unfortunately, it never really healed properly, and if I happen to do it too fast with anyone that has a vaguely tight clunge, then it tends to shred my cock.

I'm really wishing it was vagina dentata now, cos then that'd make me look more manly.
(Ghost Atreides enjoying incontestable health benefits on, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:43, Reply)

Wasn't the same girl was it?

(i should have joined myspace, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:59, Reply)

No, thankfully
The first girl to rip my cock to shreds ditched me in January 2008, and I haven't spoken to her since about July 2008.
(Ghost Atreides enjoying incontestable health benefits on, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 0:03, Reply)

Well...
My best friend just told me he and his wife are moving to Australia, and I'm now sat at home watching Blade Trinity.
(SnowyTheWereRabbit the Leporid from Hell, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:52, Reply)

Dude, that's not cool
Honestly, did you need to torture yourself on top of hearing about your best mate and wife moving to Australia?
(Ghost Atreides enjoying incontestable health benefits on, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 0:12, Reply)

It's OK
I've realised The Thick Of It is up on iPlayer now so I'm watching that instead.
(SnowyTheWereRabbit the Leporid from Hell, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 0:14, Reply)

Nothing bad ever happens to me.
I'm a cheery contented bloke.

And a B3TA pariah.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:54, Reply)

pariah?
apart from robbing crispy cakes off folks younger than thyself you're not all bad.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:57, Reply)

Will you STOP GOING ON ABOUT THE FUCKING CAKE, eh?
For the benefit of others, I went out on the piss with Blaireau69 the other week.

His mate came along and his mate's wife had made some nice cakey which was intended for Mr 69.

Blaireau69 spent a lot of time gazing out of the window at passing cars.

I ate the cakey.

AM I A CRIMINAL?
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 0:03, Reply)

Cake is for everyone.

(i should have joined myspace, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 0:05, Reply)

Wrong.
Cakey is for me.

You should know that - under the sign that says "Welcome to Barrow - twinned with Hell" it says "All cakey to be sent to our greatest native son, The Disappointed, and god bless all who sail in him."
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 0:09, Reply)

I have never seen that part of the sign
Just a few pictures of submarines surrounded by vandalism. So you are the stealer. How can you miss an entire cake though? Surely he would have noticed the eating?
(i should have joined myspace, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 0:29, Reply)

It was a small cakey.
Blown up out of ALL proportion.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 0:32, Reply)

A cupcake?
A cupcake is not for sharing. fact. But several cupcakes...?
(i should have joined myspace, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 0:35, Reply)

You are a criminal
For not sharing the cake. Shame on you.
(Ghost Atreides enjoying incontestable health benefits on, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 0:09, Reply)

The cakey could have been shared.
I would have shared it, but the poster above was too pre-ocuppied.

Kindly let this be an end to cakey correspondence.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 0:15, Reply)

If that is true
Then where is my cake now?

Hmm?
(Ghost Atreides enjoying incontestable health benefits on, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 0:17, Reply)

Well it couldn't be shared infinately.
Have some virtual cakey and be satisfied, my man.

Bedtime. Some of us (me) must work at early 'o clock tomorrow.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 0:30, Reply)

i've just read your link and i gotta say...
you have to accept the responsibility for RIPPING YOUR OWN COCK TO BITS.
don't blame the clunge.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:56, Reply)

I can blame the second clunge
As it was the one wot destroyeded my cock.

The first one was more my fault though. I'll own up to that one.
(Ghost Atreides enjoying incontestable health benefits on, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 0:11, Reply)