If I hit you on the ass, can I be your ass-bitch for the evening?

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 19:37, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

what's an ass-bitch?

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 19:38, Reply)

Someone who'll hit your ass on demand
and spank it like a pair of bongo-drums.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 19:40, Reply)

That's not something I generally ask for.

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 19:41, Reply)

Perhaps I can be of more use solving your 99 problems
That's so many problems I can pick and choose which ones I want to solve.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 19:45, Reply)

go on then

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 19:48, Reply)

If you list your problems
I can pick one. Only one I can see is an unspanked ass.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 19:52, Reply)

the spanking would be easier than trying to list 99 pointless problems

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 19:54, Reply)

* rubs hands together in anticipation *

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 19:57, Reply)

*holds breath*
*shuts eyes real tight*
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 19:59, Reply)

* takes a few warm-up swings *

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 20:02, Reply)

oh just get on with it

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 20:06, Reply)

Hand-ass contact in 5. 4. 3. 2. 1.

WHACK!

And just look at those shockwaves ripple through your fleshy buttocks!
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 20:11, Reply)

I'll have you know that I have quite a firm buttocks
I can't make it clap or anything
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 20:13, Reply)

FIrm on the inside, fleshy on the outside
I've never heard of applauding buttocks, but I have heard of someone using their buttocks to crack open wallnuts.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 20:26, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUQLQnZiMTI
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 20:33, Reply)

It's cheating if you're pretending the precussion in the background-music is clapping

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 20:41, Reply)

ignoring that bit, I'm just saying my cheeks don't swing together like that

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 20:44, Reply)

Is this something you aspire to
or would that just be an inconvenience?
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 20:47, Reply)

ummm......no
I'm good
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 20:52, Reply)

If you had fleshy buttocks
You could sit wherever you wanted without feeling uncomfortable.

Your buttocks would just squeeze into the background like a pair of flexible Tetris-pieces designed to fill any gap.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 20:58, Reply)