You could always give them the blue injection
and then have 'em stuffed. That way, they'll never get older, they'll never incur vets bills, they'll never need feeding, won't use a litter tray, nor will they claw your sofa.

And you, on the other hand, will have a handy coffee table/pouffe/backscratcher/mop/emergency loo brush. Everybody wins!

Please note that DiT does not endorse killing household pets in order to use them as footstools, or any of the above suggestions
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:30, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

if they get a red injection

do they wake from their cat matrix?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:31, Reply)

lol at this

( Peej, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 15:11, Reply)

My dad predicts my future to be full of stuffed cats,
my mother's pearls, and an upright piano.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:33, Reply)

Will this be some sort of wierd stuffed animal Bordello?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:34, Reply)

Apparently, yes.
And the cats will all have squinty eyes.
This is what my dad says.
He says I'll sit in my mother's pearls in their from room, bashing on the piano, singing to all the stuffed cats that have had their eyes set wonky.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:35, Reply)

This is the stuff of nightmares

I also imagine there will be lashings of Gin
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:36, Reply)

Of course
and cough linctus.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:37, Reply)

5) Profit

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:38, Reply)

Eh?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:39, Reply)

is your did euphemising that your mother is going to jizz round your neck?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:37, Reply)

You know that when he was buying them...
he emailed me "Do you think your mother would like a pearl necklace for her anniversary?"
and I replied "You dirty bastard"
and it took him a while to realise...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:38, Reply)

hehehe
good work
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:41, Reply)

he sent back:
"You disgust me. You're not too old for cot death. Watch your back."
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:44, Reply)

your dad sounds awesome

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:45, Reply)

yeah but what was he gonna do to my back?
More pearls????
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:46, Reply)

let's hope not
that'd be kinda gross
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:49, Reply)

Yes
I went there...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:50, Reply)

you fucked your dad?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:51, Reply)

Vomits.
It's ok because he's only my cousin really.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:52, Reply)

the girl has standards
good stuff

you should head down here for a 3-way
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:58, Reply)

Oh my god
I just made ectoplasm
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:59, Reply)

spiritual
I like it
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 15:14, Reply)

Er
Yes.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 15:19, Reply)

Water/Laptop interface achieved.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:38, Reply)

This is initially confusing!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 14:38, Reply)