My question is
Why did I do my hair and make up, get dressed, generally make the effort, and THEN have case of the galloping plop plops because of my IBS?
I'd have much preferred NOT to have gone to all that effort if I was gonna be staying off work anyway.

I now have a head like Girls' World (Brunette Edition) but am in my pyjamas and fearing another escape to the Thomas Crapper.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 11:48, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I could have gone my whole life
without knowing that.
( Peej, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 11:49, Reply)

I didn't want you to

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 11:53, Reply)

POIDH!!!

(MichaelS wasn't picked again, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 11:53, Reply)

you know what that means right?
I don't fancy seeing photos of her bowel-produce
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 11:54, Reply)

It's the hair we want to see!!!!

(MichaelS wasn't picked again, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 11:55, Reply)

The wig is on form today.
I look like Louise effing Brooks. My eyelashes are all mascara'd up, like spiders, the works. Alas, nobody shall see it.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 12:27, Reply)

Tease!

(MichaelS wasn't picked again, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 12:28, Reply)

I looked like a fucking smackhead yesterday
all day in work, and bumping into loads of people while shopping.
WHY???
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 12:30, Reply)

I am sure you were fine yesterday.
Subtle dishevelment can indicate a high degree of sophistication as is also shown by your often insightful and erudite posts.
(MichaelS wasn't picked again, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 12:47, Reply)

Hmmm
I think you're mocking me.
And I really looked like a shoplifter yesterday.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 12:49, Reply)

I am not purposly trying to mock you and apologize if it seems that way.

(MichaelS wasn't picked again, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 13:23, Reply)

(!)

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 14:01, Reply)

Is that sarcasm
or 'Fadge: A View From Cunnilingus Valley'?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 14:13, Reply)

I'm merican so too stupid for sarcasm
(It wasn't mean mocking anyway).
(MichaelS wasn't picked again, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 17:40, Reply)

IBS is not funny
My younger brother has the definitive version.

He has to have at least 3 shits just to go out and buy a bottle of milk.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 12:02, Reply)

Sorry but taht made me laugh!

Could he wear a nappy?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 12:28, Reply)

Not while riding a bike

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 12:30, Reply)

I don't mind going loads
It's when it's accompanied by a sore tummy and total exhaustion that it bugs me.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 12:28, Reply)

It's when we are about to go out, and he reaches the front door
and he does a U turn. It's very annoying, but I just feel sorry for him. The number of trains we have missed.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 12:33, Reply)

why doesn't he just purchase milk in larger quantities?
*confused face*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 12:34, Reply)

This is an example,
demonstrating how IBS can effect people undertaking tasks with little or no stress.

If he has to go somewhere important, he starts shitting the day before.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 12:37, Reply)

"This isn't all I do, you know - drink milk and poo..."
Monty, don't let me down...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 12:50, Reply)

We know that, you are more than 6 months old
and thus have learned other skills
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 12:55, Reply)

Nooooo
but I want you to say where the quote is from!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 12:58, Reply)

Look who's talking?
I tried to google it, but it's too much work.

I'm happy with my original comment though.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 13:06, Reply)

Madam you have bested me.
Pray, name your source, for I know it not.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 13:07, Reply)

Mary Whitehouse Experience
Bladdyblub on purchasing only milk and bog-roll at the supermarket.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 13:12, Reply)

Excellant

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 13:18, Reply)

You being sarky?
Are you from Sark?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 13:20, Reply)

No,
I thought your recollection of the Mary Whithouse Experience was admirable.

I gave up being sarky years ago, it was stopping me having sex.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 13:24, Reply)

Haha well done!
I bloody wish they'd release it on DVD...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 13:35, Reply)

Bartleby having sex?
Or being sarky?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 14:04, Reply)

WOAH NELLY!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 14:13, Reply)

Ah, now you see MWE was utterly, utterly shit.
Hence, I do not know the quotes.

'See you, unfunny student in-joke arsewipe who looks like the equally shit Lightning Seeds frontman? That's you that is.'

Ah. Ahahaha. Ahahahahahahahah.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 14:54, Reply)

Monty, Monty, Monty.
Please tell us who you like, so we can become awesomely cultured like wot you are.

Who makes good music?

Who makes you laugh?

What books should we be reading?

What's good on the box?
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 15:02, Reply)

Tractor
Jerry Sadowitz
Keep it Together by Rich Deakin
Dog the Bounty Hunter

£10 please.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 15:21, Reply)

Its in the post.
Thanks, Beside Jerry Sadowitz, who is great, I will have to research the others.

Cheers.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 15:24, Reply)

I thought you were being sarky.
If you're serious I can suggest more things, you just have to tell me what you're into...
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 15:32, Reply)

For sarky see above.
I was genuinly interested, and will certainly be looking up Tractor tonight when I get home.

My younger years were dogged by very restrictive musical exposure. It was rock and roll or the Beatles. So I missed loads of interesting stuff in the 70's and 80's, and am now trying to catch up. Same goes for reading, if it wasn't a text book or a haynes manual, I wasn't interested.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 15:39, Reply)