No reply necessary.
My son hates me and wants me dead. How do I know?

He brought me kebab meat and chips for lunch.

He reckons the way to my heart is a well trodden path.

Good lad.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Fri 14 May 2010, 13:31, 40 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

The greedy man and the gileynour are weel met.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Fri 14 May 2010, 13:39, Reply)

Steady on!
Gileynour? That's not very kind. He's too daft for suchness.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Fri 14 May 2010, 13:49, Reply)

It's a wise man knows his father.
- that better?
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Fri 14 May 2010, 14:03, Reply)

True wisdom lies in knowing the difference between faith and knowledge.

(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Fri 14 May 2010, 14:07, Reply)

I have a 99
I got a bit of icecream on my nose.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:40, Reply)

Because you have a big Gonzo-esq hook nose?
(muppet, not crazy dyslexic Tesco obsessed poster on here)
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:45, Reply)

I hada 99 the other day - it cost £2:50 and tasted of whisked fat

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:47, Reply)

£1.50
with nuts and strawberry syrup. YAY
(PsychoChomp, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:50, Reply)

It's all about Raspberry, sorry

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:53, Reply)

chocolate sauce actually

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:54, Reply)

Cornetto,
surely?
(Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 14 May 2010, 14:19, Reply)

I'm going to the shop, do you want anything?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:21, Reply)

it's basically liquid sugar,
it didn't taste of anything in particular.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:56, Reply)

I had a lemon sorbet and strawberry ice cream cone a few days ago.
Fucking excellent.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:49, Reply)

I had one of those new Magnum Golds the other day.
Didn't taste like Gold bars and was definitely not worth £1.59, especially when I dropped some down my top in the middle of the street :(
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:50, Reply)

White or classic Magnums rock

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:55, Reply)

Oh man, I can't believe that hilarious annecdote didn't happen in time for the breasts /qotw.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:55, Reply)

I wish you two would just get a room and get on with it.
It's like Moonlighting all over again.
( girlinthehole, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:57, Reply)

I'm going to talk directly at the audience.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:59, Reply)

No.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:09, Reply)

Fuck off.
Anyway, it wasn't on my tits.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:08, Reply)

you're only nice to me when I'm on the popular page.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:33, Reply)

I'm never nice to you.
The popular page has got nowt to do with it, I'm not that shallow.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:36, Reply)

The day my daughter brings me Doner and Chips for lunch
is the day I can die happy.
( Peej, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:43, Reply)

And fat.

( girlinthehole, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:45, Reply)

Train her well, young Starwalker, and all shall be seen.

(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Fri 14 May 2010, 13:50, Reply)

There is no off switch on a tiger.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Fri 14 May 2010, 13:54, Reply)

Basically I have no interest in any posts
that aren't about Busi and his dungs, sorry.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:11, Reply)

I just read your sig as
"Most likely to wear tweed drugs"
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:12, Reply)

I would
particularly like some tweed drugs. Which of the existing ones do you think tweed could be best applied to?
(berk, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:14, Reply)

It could be a new abbreviation for Thai Weed.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:15, Reply)

A tweed patterned e tab perhaps?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:16, Reply)

I like this idea
they could do a collectable set - tartan, union jack etc.
(berk, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:17, Reply)

Burbury?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:20, Reply)

Chavs
drug of choice!
(berk, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:23, Reply)

That,
and ones with tiny nike ticks, and Juicy Coture logos on.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:29, Reply)

T'weed is Yerksha laak. Tha knows.

(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Fri 14 May 2010, 14:17, Reply)

On
Ilkley Moor ba t'at?
(berk, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:22, Reply)

Aye. 'appen.

(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Fri 14 May 2010, 14:24, Reply)

'appen
Ilkley Moor is fecking nippy without a hat, actually. Not really conducive to drug use...
(berk, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:26, Reply)