That's what I want to do
I want to learn to dive and then go and then go and do it somewhere beautiful. I want to own a cocktail bar on a beach. Like in Cocktail.

Wiggy said he wants to do all that too, but he pictures it a long time in the future, whereas I want to do it while I'm still youthful and exuberant.

I wouldn't want to do any of it without him though, so I'll have to keep it in my dreams unfortunately.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:02, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

Yep
I wouldn't be happy there without him. He doesn't even want to do it in the future. He likes Manchester and its weather.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:08, Reply)

Wiggy says he does want to emigrate eventually
but that he's happy at the moment, so I'm pretty much stuck here. I'm not unhappy as such, it's just I've always said since I was a teenager that my worst fear is to wake up when I'm 50 and realise I haven't done anything with my life.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:17, Reply)

Mark wants to emigrate as well
But he's too scared of leaving all the good things and friends he's got here. He'd love to live somewhere else, but can't think of risking anything.

We made another deal. We spend another 2 years in England, learning French (and he finishing learning Spanish), and then we find a job in France, Spain, South Africa or South America and live there for a while.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:26, Reply)

that's a good deal
I can't get much out of Wiggy. We said we want to emigrate, but I want Australia and he wants Canada. It's quite difficult to talk to him about it as he doesn't disagree with me unless I really force it out of him.

The only thing that would worry me about upping and leaving is that I would have to leave my friends behind, but with Facebook and stuff it's so easy to stay in contact.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:30, Reply)

And imagine the parties when they come to see you!
I know, the worst way of saying "no" is with a "well, maybe", because you can't argue, but you know it means "no".

Maybe you can find somewhere in between? TBH, I'd rather go to New Zealand than Australia, and in the south of NZ it can be pretty cold in winter (summer), if that's what he likes.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:39, Reply)

That's the thing, he doesn't like the cold,
and I hate the cold, but he says Canada's not cold (lies). I have no desire to move to Canada, but then he has no desire to move to Australia, so it's kind of a stalemate. We've said we'll go to both countries on holiday and then try and decide afterwards, but I don't think I'm going to change my mind as the weather and activities in Aus are a huge part of it for me, so if he feels the same about Canada then we're going to be no better off.

We had a row about it at the weekend because I was saying to him that of all these things I come up with for us to do with our lives, he never says "oh hell yes, I really want to do that!" so I'm always disheartened by it because I feel like I'm the only one who wants to actually do anything when he's happy to just stagnate where he is. I've been brought up by a family who travels around a lot and has had adventures, whereas his family have lived in the house they're in now for most of their lives and granny lives down the road, etc. This is exactly the kind of life I want to avoid.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:48, Reply)

It sounds hard
(You can tell him from me that Canada IS cold)

Maybe he's just a bit scared and as soon as he starts moving you won't be able to stop him. Has his office other offices in other parts of the world? Maybe he can get an assignment, even if it's only in Europe, but it's a good start. That's how Mark started to think about moving, after 3 months working in Brussels.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:54, Reply)

I thought about that, he's working for a huge bank so it's possible.
I think he wants to get to certain stage in his career where he can go freelance for lots of money, so he would only need to work a certain amount of time over the year, the rest of the time we could do what we want. That I would be happy with.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:59, Reply)

That sounds like a great plan
And a good middle point for both of you. How long does he think he'll need to get it all sorted?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 16:00, Reply)

Sorry, was at the bank.
It's a few years away methinks, he's working his way up at the moment. I feel like time is just rushing by at the moment which is compounding the problem, it seems like this year has flown and I worry that I'll suddenly realise I'm 35 and it's too late.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 16:41, Reply)

Yes, I've been feeling like that lately
35 doesn't have to be too late, but all depends on what you want. If you want a family then it probably is :(

If you don't want a family it should be ok.

I first moved from Spain when I was 25, and now after 5 years in England I feel like my blood is boiling, calling for another move.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 16:45, Reply)

Yeah I think that's my problem
I have restless blood. My dad's been all over the world, to almost every country. He lived in Malta when he was younger and he's got the best stories. I want to have stories.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 16:49, Reply)

My parents never travelled much
Us living in the Canary Islands and all the family in mainland Spain meant that all our holidays were always to Barcelona and Sevilla, which are good, but you get a bit tired of them after 25 years. I felt as if my family was robbing me of the opportunity to discover the world when I was at my best; that I had to move around and see as much as I could.

There is always someone tying me back. My family mainly, but right now it seems like nobody can force me to anything. I want to travel as much as possible before having kids, and then travel more.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 16:52, Reply)

yeah me too
I want to try and fit as much in as possible before I have kids. I hope I don't resent them!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 16:55, Reply)

I'm going to make them travel like mad!
I think they'll end up just wanting to stay in a place for holidays :)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 17:01, Reply)