Kick her in the tits and tell her to make you a fucking cup of tea.
Sorted.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Fri 18 Jun 2010, 11:30, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

Did I not mention she is rather large.
She must have two stone on me.
Besides, the dog goes for me if we so much as cuddle.

Also - it's our 20th wedding anniverary next week. Do you think her sulks could be feigned to wangle an extra special pressie?
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Fri 18 Jun 2010, 11:33, Reply)

Her tits should be easy to kick then

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 18 Jun 2010, 11:36, Reply)

just aim for the shins.

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Fri 18 Jun 2010, 11:41, Reply)

Get a ladder then

(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 18 Jun 2010, 11:48, Reply)

yes they could be
are you planning anything special?
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 18 Jun 2010, 12:10, Reply)

Diamonds.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Fri 18 Jun 2010, 12:20, Reply)

ooh very nice
can't really build more on that
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 18 Jun 2010, 12:22, Reply)

Yeah but he was only getting her zirconias til this morning

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 18 Jun 2010, 12:27, Reply)